Forever Mithril
by JediKnightBalthasar
Summary: Legolas hides a secret from the fellowship, because if he tells he knows they will treat him as a child. But his secret is coming back to haunt him...*Ch. 9 up* (sequel to Cold Steel)
1. Default Chapter

To Ariel, who tries  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Hey, everybody! This is a sequel to "Cold Steel", though I suppose it could stand on its on. Originally, I was only going to write one story, but a sequel was in popular demand. If you do not like this story and wish to flame it, there is a note to all flamers in the fourth chapter of "Cold Steel", but I am not averse to constructive criticism (calling Legolas OOC is not constructive). Anyway, have fun reading! Please review!  
  
To the reviewers for the last chapter of "Cold Steel":  
  
Lady Daine: You don't have to say anything, concerning something like that it's hardly expected. Writing is a common way to vent, I'm glad to hear it works for you and anger. Wow. . .thank you for saying, well, everything you said. It really means something to me, thank you.  
  
Feline Daemon: Thanks for reviewing, glad you liked it!  
  
Lirenel: As for mush, I felt it would ruin things a bit. I hadn't really any conception of Thranduil, only that he arrested Bilbo for no real reason, so I thought he might be paranoid or ruthless, which usually comes from inner pain so I guess I made him as mentally unbalanced as his son. It already has helped. Thank you very much.  
  
Karate Elf: Thank you, and this goes on to the Council. Hope you like!  
  
Mebrireth: Thanks. Flamers really bother me, for the reason you said, and also because if you don't have anything nice to say be quiet, so just something I wanted to teach them. Thanks for reviewing and hope you liked the rest of the story.  
  
Wicked Misty: Thanks. Sorry this took so long, by the way.  
  
Kaimelieamin: Ah, the story was that transparent? Thank you very much for saying what you said, I know I say that a lot but I mean it every time. Cutting is an addiction and it is terrible to get off it.  
  
Coco Beans: Wow. . .thank you, thanks for saying that. I'm glad you have decided to help others with your experiences. Sorry this bit took so long.  
  
Inside Out: First, Legolas appreciates your hug. Yes, it came out on the eighteenth. Thank you for all your reviews!  
  
Ruby: It's good to know that you came out of your depression, that is a difficult thing to do, congratulations. Thanks a lot for reviewing (and for putting me on your favourites list)!  
  
I can't seem to access the others. . .bloody broken computer. If I didn't respond to you in this chapter I will in the next. Thanks to all of you who reviewed and especially thanks to all of you who are sticking around for this story! Sorry it took so long to get started!  
  
  
  
  
  
*****  
  
"Legolas, I know you have only just returned from your last journey, but it has come up that an Elf must be sent to participate in this council of sorts, and you are the best choice. Will you do this?"  
  
Legolas sighed. He had just returned from a journey, yes, one which had been delayed by hostile dwarves. It had been his hopes that he could come home and relax for a while, at least eat a decent meal and bathe. Now it looked like he would be riding out again. "Where is this council?"  
  
"In Rivendell."  
  
Rivendell? Legolas perked up at the mention. It had been many years since he had seen his friend Elrohir for a time, though brief encounters were not uncommon. Often, about seventy years past, Legolas would see Estel, but the twins were often off on orc-hunts or the like. "When do I leave?"  
  
*****  
  
A week later, dew clung to the leaves of the trees and a fine mist shrouded all. Hardly a bird dared disturb the hanging silence. A lone rider faced this mist, the clopping of his horse's hooves sad and slow. An elven tune floated around him.  
  
And this is just the start! Legolas thought. Someone, somewhere, does not want me to get to Rivendell!  
  
But despite the Elf's paranoia, the fog had lifted by mid-morning, and the sun burned down on his neck. While before all had been skewed by the fog, it was now crystal clear. That was far better, as it is very unsettling for an Elf, with Elven eyes, to be unable to see.  
  
"Perhaps this may yet be a nice journey, without any Dwarves," said he to himself. "Soon I shall see. Indeed odd, there is no question about that."  
  
The weather pulled no further tricks on Legolas, and he managed the ride to Imladris in less than three weeks. He was eager to arrive, which prompted him to ride faster and longer. These tactics worked well, though they exhausted the horse, the elf as well.  
  
"Rivendell," Legolas whispered, just able to see it in the valley. Hope fluttered in his heart, and with renewed strength he descended into the glen.  
  
*****  
  
"Legolas, I did not expect to see you here. Welcome to Rivendell."  
  
"You were honestly not expecting to see me? I would always come to Rivendell, though it has been many years," Legolas said. "It is good to be here." He took a deep breath and looked around him. It was just the same is in his memory, for which he was glad.  
  
"You do not know why you are here," Elrond stated, quite certain.  
  
"True," Legolas said, "I am a messenger of the king, nay do I read the messeges." His keen eyes spotted someone, and his head turned ever so slightly. "Estel is here? That's odd. Are the twins here as well?"  
  
"Aragorn has brought a number of halflings to Imladris. Elrohir is not here. He should return soon," Elrond added, seeing Legolas's disappointment. "Why don't you go seek Aragorn? And see if you can't get him to wash his hair. . ."  
  
Legolas liked Aragorn, Estel to his mind. He had known the human since he was a baby, hardly three years old, and (Legolas loved telling this story) Estel had thrown up all over him. Still, he had grown up to be an honourable and easily embaressed Ranger.  
  
"Estel!" Legolas called, spotting him trying to shoo away two hobbits. The two turned at the odd name, and Aragorn as well.  
  
"Legolas!" The two embraced.  
  
"You are frightening when you smile," Legolas noted. "Your teeth are so white, and your hair is so black, that there is this contrast--"  
  
"Do you mean to say, 'Gee, Aragorn, how did you manage to get so incredibly dirty?' Well, if you must know, I've been traveling with these hobbits, and two of their companions--"  
  
"We're on a mission!" one of the hobbits said eagerly.  
  
"Pippin!"  
  
"Oh, that's real friendly!" complained the one called Pippin, sulking off. Legolas smiled.  
  
"No matter what peril, it is good to see you again," Legolas said.  
  
"Oh, you, too. I get away with much more when you are around, it comes of my looking up to you. Don't blush! You knew!" Aragorn was blushing himself. "I've looked up to you since the first time I met you, when I was six."  
  
"You were three," Legolas amended with a grin. "And you mmph---"  
  
"Not in front of the hobbits, Legolas," Aragorn said, covering Legolas's mouth. He moved his hand when Legolas nodded.  
  
"Do you ever bathe?" the Elf demanded. "And you act like a child, by the way, not an eighty-seven-year-old."  
  
"Strider's eighty-seven?" Pippin asked. "And you've known him--" Pippin counted on his fingers "--eighty four years?"  
  
"Oh, indeed," Legolas said, laughing. "Since he was three years old."  
  
"Legolas--"  
  
"And he threw up all over me," Legolas finished, just to see Estel blush with fury and embaressment. The hobbits laughed, and Aragorn grinned, biting back anger. "You were very cute, Estel," Legolas said, patting his friend on the head. The hobbits doubled over with laughter.  
  
"Both of you stop it!" Aragorn commanded, and the hobbits did. "Ha, all right, enough. At the very least use my proper name, Legolas, you clown."  
  
"Right, right. Sorry about that, I play to an audience."  
  
"Like a puppet," Aragorn concurred. "Frankly, I'm amazed you would touch my hair."  
  
"It was pretty gross." Legolas smiled. He was glad, for now, that Elrohir was not there, as well as Arwen. He suspected that Arwen was well aware of what he had done years past. If Estel knew, that would change everything. Estel looked up to him, and Legolas suspected would not be so careless if he knew.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
That first chapter was just to show how a few characters interact, more will happen in the next chapter. It didn't seem right to start off without knowing the characters, this story is about them, after all. Also, this chapter was meant to show Legolas as a happy sort of guy, and how Aragorn looks up to him. I know Tolkien never wrote that. 


	2. The Council of Elrond

A/n: The Council is in this chapter, and it will be movieverse.  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing (though I did buy my own copy of Return of the King tonight, before I could only borrow my dad's copy and it was getting to be very old and falling apart)  
  
To reviewers:  
  
Gwyn: Hasn't been that long! And anyway, I had a lot of things I had to do. Unfortunately, although on break, I still have a lot of school work. I've done my best, though, please don't persecute me for it. Anyway, at least the story's good, eh?  
  
Soul Searcher Arbariel: Thanks. . .gee, hopefully you don't think Boromir is hot, this chapter is none too nice to him. Thanks! And what is moofa?  
  
Lou: Thanks. Hopefully this one can stand on its own, so "Cold Steel" is not needed to understand it. But supposedly it's a good story. . .  
  
Fairy Lady: Legolas has grown and matured, he is nowhere near as vulnerable as he was in the last one. Happy or not, he will be stable for at least the first two or three chapters.  
  
Starfleet Hobbit: Thanks.  
  
Padfoots Girl: Okay and thanks!  
  
Ola: There wasn't a button on the right side of the screen because the author had not yet written a new chapter! But now she has!  
  
Wicked Misty: Stupid slow computer! Bad machine. . .I am also anxious to see what will happen in future chapters, heh heh. Thanks!  
  
Autumn: Good, it sticks to facts. Just for meticulous fact-checkers such as yourself I shall try to keep it perfect in continuity. Thanks!  
  
Miss No Name: So, you probably want me to take down this story, huh? Just kidding!  
  
Jessie Weasly: You aren't the only one! But then, if that were so, how could Celeborn say that he had not been to Lothlorien in "eight and thirty years"? k, thanks for reviewing!  
  
Finnov: All in good time. . .  
  
Koorinoen: Well, they aren't "cute" for much longer, but I'll try to write a few more "cute" moments between them.  
  
Java Galxy: Don't worry, Legolas will stay happy-ish at the very least until Caradhras (sp?).  
  
Kaimelian: I have no idea how to lark. Prancing I can manage, but larking is completely beyond me. You do not need coffee, you need ritalin. Just kidding! How many chances do you think he gets to wash his hair? Being a Ranger, I mean. Legolas really is happy, though. The last story was centuries ago. Have you begun caffeine withdrawal yet, by the way?  
  
Lady Daine: Yes, the hobbits will respect him despite. . .if they respected him to begin with! Thanks, but a warning: it's not a humor story, the next chapters will not be so comical.  
  
Karate Elf: Thanks and okay, I'll write more!  
  
  
  
And to the rest of you who reviewed "Cold Steel":  
  
Fenris: Woah. . .by the Valar, thank you so much for saying everything you said, it really means a lot that you said that. I'm sure your writing is very good, though. I totally agree that it is not sick and twisted for some of us it is a way to get your feelings out to the world, to show that no matter what is on the outside it is different within. Everyone I have told was surprised to learn I was cutting. Also some stories can tell people that it's all right, things are not as bad as they look, and people do care, and these sorts of things are not worth doing! Anyway, sorry to babble. Thank you again!  
  
Lady Macbeth: The reason Legolas's brother's part was unfulfilled was that the story was mostly from Elrohir's perspective, without lapsing from third person. Naithon will be mentioned in this story, a bit. My friend had wanted to see Trainspotting but his mother would not let him so he came over and watched it with my sister and I so I had just seen it when I wrote that chapter.  
  
Susan: Thanks, and here is the sequel!  
  
Linz: Thank you very, very much!!  
  
Sleep Miluv: Thanks! Because of the number of people wanting a sequel, well, I wrote one.  
  
Dream Catcher: Yes, well, the world doesn't revolve around you. Just kidding! Anyway, sequel was in popular demand. Thanks for reviewing! And happy rest-of-winter-break!  
  
Zurizip: First, for OOCs, that story was about how people change. When I wrote, it was partially for others, but also partially for myself, because I have to believe that people can change. Legolas is pretty much perfect, he is witty, smart, and loyal. Honourable. So I made him a weak, a child, to show how he changed. I know it was OOC, but that was on purpose. As you saw, at the end he was good ol' Greenleaf! Hehe. . .everyone likes Arwen in my stories, because she is always a cute little child. Take that, Arwen bashers! I meant asshole, and it is pronounced "pen-day-ho", if that helps at all. What do you mean, unorthodox? And as for the cursing, it was a bit crude, but used for emphasis. You're right, though. Hey! Stop attacking my characters!! Just kidding. Legolas: no, no she wasn't kidding! Me: Sissy. Thanks for all your reviews!  
  
Golden Rose: Why not just delete "Cold Steel" for the sequel, if it's there? Or just ignore this sequel. . .  
  
Src: To your question, yes and no. Yes, in outcome, but for different reasons. I'm glad you are enjoying it, hopefully learning from it.  
  
Finnov: Good idea, as you can see an idea I have decided to use! Thanks!  
  
Blank: Yes, I was planning a sequel.  
  
Angel of the Elves: Yes, it is a line from a song. You aren't the only who likes that line. . .heh heh. Thanks thanks thanks!  
  
Gryf Gal: Thanks, and as for the cutting, don't. Seriously. It is not worth it, and you are better than that.  
  
Soul Searcher Arbariel: Yeah, I am also big on friendship. It's important. And I wanted something cute between the two. . .worked well. **meekly** okay. . .maybe I'm an okay writer. . . Thanks! I'm glad to have been of help with yours. Geez. . .thanks. . .you made me cry. That's not common. At least it excuses typos, eh? Long reviews are good, anyway!  
  
*****  
  
  
  
"You could not have been trying your best," Aragorn said, trudging into Imladris next Legolas, his bow over one shoulder.  
  
"Or maybe you just improved," Legolas retorted, posture identical, steadying his bow with one hand.  
  
"Come on, Legolas, I'm not a child anymore. You don't have to go easy on me in archery contests."  
  
"I'm telling you, you won on your own," Legolas insisted. Suddenly he spotted something and stopped.  
  
"What is it? What do you see?" Aragorn asked, noticing his friend had stopped.  
  
"Your brothers are here," Legolas announced, and the two took off running.  
  
"Elladan!"  
  
"Elrohir!"  
  
The twins were caught off guard as Legolas and Aragorn hugged them. Elladan was so startled that he fell over, and shoved Aragorn off him quite hard. "How much do you weigh? By the Valar," Elladan muttered, brushing himself off.  
  
Elrohir, having fared better, returned Legolas's hug. "It is good to see you again! How many years has it been?"  
  
"Quite a few," Legolas said with a nod. "How have you been?"  
  
"I've been just fine, thank you, and you. . ." Elrohir glanced at Aragorn, then he lightly held Legolas's arm and asked, "are you well?"  
  
"I am, thank you," Legolas returned.  
  
"What is it?" Aragorn asked. "Why--"  
  
"Never mind," Elladan said. "How have you been? Ada said something about a journey with Hobbits!"  
  
"Oh, indeed," Aragorn answered, Elrohir and Legolas's strange exchange momentarily forgotten. "I met up with them in Bree, and assisted them in reaching Rivendell. They carried with them Sauron's ruling Ring."  
  
"Never! The One?"  
  
"The one and only. Now it has come to Rivendell, but I do not believe that this shall be all that this Ring shall cause. Elrond has called a Council tomorrow."  
  
*****  
  
Legolas felt awkward sitting in the stone chair, listening to Elrond speak. What was he doing here? This was above his head. This Ring, it was out of his reach to even understand its power and he knew it.  
  
"Bring forth the Ring, Frodo."  
  
It was a small thing, a band of gold, small as any normal ring, yet it was different. Legolas felt as if evil flowed off the ring, washing over him. It felt the same as. . .as what? He was not sure, but he had felt that way before. Part of him tugged, almost desiring the ring, but other things blotted that out--there was fear and confusion, and repulsion.  
  
"In a dream, I saw the Eastern sky grow dark," said a Man of Gondor, standing. "But in the West still a light shown." Who was this man? He had been named, but Legolas had forgotten him. Now he preached, is if the Ring's evil had touched him already. "The weapon of the Enemy is a gift, a gift to the foes of Mordor!" What? This was shocking. No one could wield the Ring of Power, to even suggest such a thing was folly. Legolas wanted to jump up and tell him so, but he knew that would be wrong. Someone had to say something, though!  
  
"You cannot wield it. No none of us can. The Ring answers to Sauron alone, it has no other master." Quite right, Aragorn! Legolas thought. He had not suspected Aragorn would be affected by the Ring, and proof of that was reassuring.  
  
"And what," sneered the man from earlier, "would a Ranger know of this matter?"  
  
Aragorn took this well, shrugging it off. Legolas would not bear it. He jumped to his feet. "This is no mere Ranger. He is Aragorn, son of Arathorn. You owe him your allegiance." The man from earlier looked on in disbelief.  
  
"Aragorn? This is Isildur's heir?" he asked disdainfully, gazing at Aragorn with equal contempt.  
  
"And heir to the throne of Gondor," Legolas reminded him, sure he came from there. Aragorn looked uncomfortable with such importance.  
  
"Havo dad, Legolas," he said, not wanting to say in the common tongue how little he wanted that title. Legolas did, but his eyes showed that he had not in the least relented. He glanced at Aragorn, the only of the three involved in the exchange that did not feel or look angry. Elrond shot him a look, as if to second the motion of asking Legolas to sit. Tension was building.  
  
"Aragorn is right, we cannot use it," Mithrander said. No one would oppose him, if out of fear or out of respect for the old wizard. "It must be destroyed." Something held him back. . .with a start Legolas realized that even Mithrander was afraid of the Ring.  
  
"The Ring was made in the fires of Mount Doom, only there can it be unmade. It must be cast back into the fires of the volcano, deep in Mordor. One of you must do this." Elrond looked around, as if asking who would take this quest.  
  
"Why?" The man from Gondor asked. "Give the Ring to Gondor! Long has my father, the steward of Gondor, kept the forces of Mordor at bay!" Legolas resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Not this again! "Lend Gondor the weapon of Mordor. Let us use it against them!"  
  
This was just too much for Legolas. It was more than stupidity. It was disrespect to Aragorn, to Elrond, and to Gandalf. He jumped up again. "Have you heard nothing Lord Elrond has said? The Ring must be destroyed!"  
  
"And I think you suppose you're the one to do it?" Challenged a dwarf, jumping to his feet. "I will be dead before I see the Ring in the hands of an Elf!"  
  
Legolas was offended by that one. 'Then you shall die,' he nearly said, although he had no intention of taking the Ring. He would be content never to see the thing again! But he would see the Ring to Mordor, for Elrond was correct: it had to be destroyed. However, as many Elves beside him sprang to their feet, Legolas held out his hands to restrain them.  
  
Before anyone knew what was happening, the dwarves were on their feet as well. Everyone was yelling. Legolas felt a line of sweat on his forehead. He hated yelling, noise drove him mad. He tried to just shut it out, when suddenly everyone was quiet.  
  
"I will take the Ring to Mordor! Although. . .I do not know the way."  
  
"I will help you bear this burden, Frodo Baggins, as long as it is yours to bear," Mithrander offered.  
  
"If by my life or death I can protect you, I will. You have my sword." Good for you, Aragorn! But he was still just a child. . .  
  
"And you have my bow," Legolas said before he knew he had spoken. Watch out for Aragorn, and also to see that thing destroyed, he told himself.  
  
"And my axe," but by the way the dwarf glared, Legolas knew he joined only because Legolas himself had, and the Dwarf would not be outdone by an Elf. So be it.  
  
"You carry the fate of us all, Little One." No, no, not him! By the Valar, anyone but him! "If this is indeed the will of the Council, Gondor will se it done." But Aragorn is coming! He can represent Gondor! Legolas kept his mouth shut. Aragorn, he knew, would rather represent the men of the North.  
  
"Oi!" A shout from behind startled Legolas, though his Elven ears had perceived someone in the bushes before the Council began. At this a chubby hobbit ran up, taking a stand beside Frodo. "Mister Frodo's not going anywhere without me."  
  
"No, indeed, it is hardly possible to separate you even when he summoned to a private Council and you are not," Elrond observed with a hint of laughter in his voice. Aragorn glanced at Legolas and the two bit their lips to keep from laughing, for they had known Elrond to explode at a lesser offense.  
  
"We're coming, too!" cried one of two hobbits as they ran out from behind two pillars. They were Pippin and--what was the other named? The ones Legolas had met before. Elrond's eyebrows shot up so high Aragorn realized that Elrond had an unnatural large forehead. This time he really might explode! Legolas felt blood from biting his lip so hard. "Anyway, you need people of intelligence on this mission. . .quest. . .thing!"  
  
"Well that rules you out, Pip," said the other.  
  
"Very well. You shall be the Fellowship of the Ring."  
  
*****  
  
"Mithrander, may I speak with you?"  
  
"Yes, Elrohir, what is it?" the old wizard responded. He had known the sons of Elrond for many years, and knew well the nervousness in Elrohir's voice.  
  
"You are part of this Fellowship, that will be setting out for Mordor? Might I ask of you. . .look after Legolas," he requested.  
  
"Legolas?" Mithrander was confused by this. "I have known Legolas for many years, and never have I known him to be anything but trustworthy."  
  
"He is very trustworthy. I would trust him with my life. But many years ago, when we were children--Legolas and I--I knew him to be quite different from who he is today. Legolas used to cut his arms and his legs with a dagger. He has scars. . .one on his right arm, many more on his left arm and his legs. Please, do not tell him I have told you this, for he would be angry, but just watch out for him."  
  
"Of course," Mithrander said. This would not be easy. 


	3. The Ring Goes South

Disclaimer: If I owned Lord of the Rings, I would be Tolkien Enterprises or New Line Productions, which I am not.  
  
Wicked Misty: No, it's not sad, it just means that nothing particularly good happened that day. Which really is sort of sad, when you think about it. Anyway, thanks! Good to hear from you!  
  
Legano-san: Oh. . .kay. . .  
  
Person who left the little identification box completely blank: To answer your question, yes!  
  
I Stalk Elves on Weekends: Thanks. If he is not too OOC those stupid flamers have nothing to complain about. Flamers suck! Thanks for reviewing!  
  
Miss No Name: Okay, okay, sheesh. I'll keep you from being bored by updating--there, happy? Lucky, you get cold weather. . .there are voices in my head, too! It is not insanity, it is simply talking to yourself. That's what I say, anyway, it can get to a point, like Virginia Woolf, where it really needs to stop. Anyway, thanks for reviewing!  
  
Fairy Lady: yes, but will Legolas see it as a good thing or as not allowing him to move on? Right, everyone listen to her and keep Legolas and daggers separated!  
  
Yoink Daydurfurits: Believe it or not it's true! But here's more, so if you can un-faint long enough you can read it!  
  
Ola: Okay! And yes, the other fic is the one about his past.  
  
Mysterious Jedi: Yay, another Knight! Glad you like it!  
  
Cool Girl Chic 16: Yes it made sense. Thanks!  
  
Kaimelieamin: It was not a mistake, it was a double negation: "I have NEVER know him to be anything BUT trustworthy." Thus, "I have always known him to be trustworthy." After Mithrandir falls into shadow, well, I have something planned, that's all I'm saying. No spoilers! Woah, too much coffee. . .one time a boy came into history with coffee and he asked if he could drink it and the history teacher said "Well, I can't let you drink coffee. . .you said that was a soda, right?" It was cool. Anyway--tangent!  
  
Padfoots Girl: Okay and thanks!  
  
Queen of the Little People: Thanks and okay, I will!  
  
Ash: Thanks! Wow, that was almost a haiku! Cool! Only the middle line has three too many syllables, but still that's pretty neat.  
  
Queen of Gondor: It's hard to explain. Mostly he felt that every bad thing was his fault, so he wanted to punish himself for what he had done. Also, when he sliced and saw the blood it took him away. You could read "Cold Steel", which is the story of his cutting in development.(shameless self- promotion)  
  
Golden Rose: Okay! Yay, I'm on someone's favorite's list! And you are held to that--you had better keep reading! Just kidding.  
  
Gwyn: Heh, it doesn't bother me that people get really pushy about quick updates--really it is a complement, because it means people like the story. Anyway, thanks for reviewing!  
  
Baby: Ha! It's like the babysitter's club! You know, those kids' books? Ha- ha-ha. . .  
  
Daylight: Thanks and okay!  
  
Soul Searcher Arbariel: "Moofa" sounds pretty cool. Yeah, I'm still going for the darkness thing, but Boromir is really annoying! Mostly, my sister kept calling him Aragorn (she says they look the same) and it bugged me (I don't suppose it helped when I referred to them as "Los hermanos de Gondor"). Woah. . .you have to be kidding, no way am I near as good as Tolkien! Oh, and I've read your Legolas angst story. . .it was good, especially when he jumped off the cliff, that was VERY good.  
  
S: Thanks and okay.  
  
Kat Heiman: Thanks and it's a very short wait!  
  
Legolas 4me: Thanks! Hopefully it really will be a good story.  
  
Achika-chan: Surprises around every corner. . .  
  
Lady Daine: No, just movieverse for the Council, because in the book there were so many huge speeches and such. Anyway, hurrying things along I used the movie version, but from here on though some dialogue will come from the movie it will be the book version. As for Elrohir knowing Mithrandir, that bit I was unsure about but Elrond sure seems to know him, so. . .  
  
Forest Elfin: If and when the Fellowship finds out, you shall know then! Heh, evil author that is me. . .no spoilers, though, those are no fun.  
  
Nobody: Hello, Odysseus! Just kidding, because Odysseus told the Cyclops that he was called "Nobody", and the Cyclops ran about screaming that Nobody had hurt him. Nevermind. Sorry! Was it that long of a time between chapters?  
  
Thanks to everyone who reviewed!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Legolas surveyed the Fellowship in his mind, reserving his gaze lest any catch on. Aragorn he knew well to be a man of honor, and while Legolas saw him as a child he saw it fit that he should be part of the fellowship. Boromir he had less liking for, of his bravado Legolas could stand little and saw need for even less. Gimli he supposed could and likely would be a right good companion if he would be give the Elf a chance, but all the Dwarf seemed to want to do was stare unhappily at him. The hobbits, numbering four, were--  
  
A loud, clear ringing interrupted Legolas's thoughts. It was not so loud to the others, but Legolas had Elven hearing and cringed at the boisterous noise. He hated noise, it made him think things. . ."Legolas, are you all right?" whoever that was they were quiet.  
  
"Quite, and I apologize for any misconception," Legolas reply, shaking off his nervousness. Where had that noise come from, though? It was not Elven, but it was not of the orcs, either.  
  
"Slow should you be to wind that horn again, Boromir, until you stand once more on the borders of your land, and dire need is on you," Elrond advised. That was it, then.  
  
"Maybe, but always have I let my horn cry at setting forth, and though thereafter we may walk in the shadows, I will not go forth as a thief in the night," Boromir answered with cocky arrogance. This Elrond endured, as often he did, but Legolas fumed. He shook the idea of slaughter from his head and went back to his review of comrades.  
  
The hobbits, indeed, were each different cases. Pippin and Merry (Legolas had made a point of listening for that name, lest he need to address the hobbit and be required to call out "hey, you!") seemed good of heart, simple like all hobbits but not dumb. They could also be cute and mischievous, but that could be endured as well. Sam had an unquestionable loyalty and was, like all hobbits, simple but not dull. He seemed to Legolas a friend much as Elrohir had been in their earlier days. . .the fourth of the hobbits, Legolas reminded himself, pulling out of nostalgia, was the Ring-bearer. He was named Frodo, and solemn and serious at all times. The ring has already begun its work. . .  
  
Where did that come from? Never in my life have I had such thoughts, Legolas thought with worry. He glanced about him. The others seemed to be having thoughts of their own. Sam was speaking softly to Bill, the pony who had become the official Fellowship mascot, it seemed. Legolas was really starting to like this Sam, who was soft spoken, reserved in judgment, loyal, and always seemed happy--if nervous. Not nervous as I am, thought Legolas, for what I am is not nerves but apprehension.  
  
Frodo and Bilbo, the elderly hobbit, stood together near the door. Perhaps they spoke, perhaps they did not. Had he wanted to Legolas could have listened in but it seemed awful of a thing to consider. Whatever words they had for each other were private and not for spying ears of Elves. Legolas shut out all sound then, and mired himself in a world of incredible silence.  
  
Goodbyes had been said now, and such dealings were over with. Legolas and Elrohir had spoken to each other, in soft words, but mostly communicating through undertones and hidden meaning. "Look out for yourself, Legolas. Just do that for me?" Elrohir had requested as the two embraced. Legolas had promised to, and that had been all.  
  
"Are we ready to leave yet? At this rate, we'll be into summer before--"  
  
"Master Dwarf, kindly hold your tongue," Legolas said in a low voice. The complaints of the small creature had drawn him from nostalgia, and his gaze had gone then to Aragorn. The Ranger felt some sorrow beyond the knowledge of Legolas as he sat on the stairs, his head resting on his knees and his hands paused as they ran through his hair.  
  
Gimli regarded Legolas with the same look one uses to regard a rat found dead on their doorstep, held at arm's length between forefinger and thumb. He grunted and turned away, but was silent. This passed muster with Legolas, who was liking the little one less and less.  
  
Elrond then came forth and Gandalf with him, the last member of the company, another known well to Legolas and entirely trusted. Some words were spoken, which Legolas did not hear, then again the dwarf found some need to argue and protest. Insolent beast, Legolas thought, but kept his mouth shut. Leaving behind the house of Elrond the nine began their journey with just nine small steps. "When and where will we meet our partings?" Legolas wondered aloud, but in the quietest of whispers.  
  
"Do not worry, mellon-nin, for many years there are between these first steps and our last together." Legolas would have believed this to be a dream or figment of imagination but for the callused hand gripping his. "Many years." Some sadness kept his voice from sounding as it usually might, yet his words rang true enough.  
  
The darkness seemed to consume them, though with his keen Elven eyes Legolas was far from crippled. An owl hooted softly and took flight from a nearby tree, a sight only Legolas was privileged enough to see. Frodo jumped half a foot, and Sam calmed him. "Just a barn owl," Legolas intoned. "And her rat-prey."  
  
They came now upon the Ford of Bruinen, and for a moment Legolas felt reluctance, and it was then that he realized he still held Aragorn's hand in his. "I remember a time when I was forbidden to cross these waters. I wanted nothing more than to simply run through the gurgling stream. . .now I wish only to return."  
  
"Nothing binds us to this quest," Legolas reminded him.  
  
"Nothing but that which cannot be by Man or Dwarf or Elf moved. I go on." And with that he strode forward and caught up to Gandalf, who was leading, to offer his knowledge of the lands. Many hours passed in a silence Legolas knew not to be of his creation or of nature and the world around him. What he did hear seemed a memory played slowly through his sense, the waters of the river running with a music no longer gay but sad, as the waters climbed back from the Bruinen.  
  
Finally the company came to a halt and made camp, for the little ones were not travelers and were nearly dead on their feet. In seconds flat the four were asleep. Aragorn was debatably awake, lying on his back staring upwards. Gimli snored loudly, and Boromir mutter incoherently. Gandalf seemed to have gone off. This left only the Elf, lying awake staring about him, trying for some sleep.  
  
I almost pity the Dwarf, he thought. The short one has no one he knows or can trust among us. While the hobbits clan together, I have Aragorn and Mithrandir. Well, not really Aragorn. It would not be right to burden him with my problems, he is but a child and burdened enough for one so young. Yet that Dwarf is utterly alone, and here only because. . .only because I am. Look at that, I have caused him this pitiful time without even trying--  
  
Legolas rolled onto his back. The stars above were a peaceful sight, rimmed with treetops. The sounds of nature filled his ears, Gimli's snores and Boromir's babbling forgotten. Birds cried out to each other. A creature, four legged, perhaps a coyote, ran through the woods. Indeed it was a coyote, for now he paused and howled, and his howl resounded through Legolas's heart.  
  
He was not sure at what point he stopped being awake and stopped being asleep, but he knew it must have happened for hours later he woke up. The others were still asleep, and Legolas jumped to his feet. As the eight members of the fellowship slept on, Legolas stared at the rising sun. Light shone over all of the company before Legolas forfeited his position, squating atop a large rock, and returned to their camp. He knew before he was within sight of them (through the trees) that Gimli and the two younger hobbits slept on, while the others were awake.  
  
"Hello, Legolas! Where did you go this dawn?" Aragorn inquired.  
  
"Only to watch the sun rise. I hope I had you not worried."  
  
"Not at all, Gandalf and I trust you on your own and Boromir, well, he seems to think that you had quit the fellowship entirely."  
  
"Hysterical," Legolas replied with no laughter.  
  
"All right then, Legolas?" Mithrandir asked.  
  
"It would appear so!" Legolas replied, and the day began as would become normal. Although it was the last sunrise any of them would see for a fortnight.  
  
*****  
  
After a cold front the nine came at last to the land called Hollin, by Men, and naught by any else. "My people lived here once," Legolas remembered sadly. "In the days when we prospered, in our time in Middle Earth. Then we called in Eregion." Legolas shifted his gaze to the far mountains, and he saw in them their dangers, their cliffs, and their precariously perched rocks. The sun glinted red off them, and rightly, thought Legolas.  
  
"We have come five-and-forty miles, as the crow flies. . ."  
  
Where are these thoughts coming from? Glad I am they stay only as thoughts, but what brings them on? Why do I feel as though each misery is by my fault? Why so much thought of death and evil? It could be the ring. Would I know if it were getting to me? Yet I have seen it not since the Council. Is it a thing of such power?  
  
Now the Dwarf Gimli spoke for many minutes of the mountains ahead, and of the caves beneath them--caves Legolas hoped he would never see. Gandalf replied, and Pippin the young hobbit said a few words, which Gandalf seemed to find enraging. He spoke of the Elves who dwelt there once and looked at Legolas as if for an answer. "Great evil must dwell in a land before it forgets the Elves. . ."  
  
"That is true, but they were of a race strange to us of the silvan folk, and the trees and the grass do not now remember them. Only I hear the stones lament them, ' deep they delved us, fair they wrought us, high they builded us; but they are gone.' They are gone. They sought the Havens long ago."  
  
Why do my words come out as sadness and mourning and foreshadowed evil? Can I not even speak? Yet sad it is, for them who do not understand, that the Elves are leaving Middle Earth forever. When I leave. . .when I leave will it be to Valinor, or to the Halls of Mandos?  
  
"Legolas, are you all right?"  
  
The others had gone on, where to Legolas could not say. "Yes, Mithrandir, I am fine."  
  
"Are you really?" he asked, as if he knew something to the contrary. As if he knew. . .  
  
"Elrohir told you," Legolas stated. He felt such a rush of emotion now, of anger, of betrayal, and of sadness. "He had no right!"  
  
"He only cares how you fare, Legolas. He wants you to be well."  
  
"I am well," Legolas said with crazy anger, "I am fine." And he stalked off, catching up with the others.  
  
*****  
  
"Psst, Pippin!"  
  
"What is it, Merry?"  
  
It was late, and the others were asleep. Legolas was staring up at the stars, feeling terrible about the way he had reacted earlier. Elrohir only cared about him, how cold could he possibly be to that? How would Mithrandir react, though? Would he treat Legolas like a child? Legolas thought to himself, I will not get any better or stronger if I am not allowed to grow. He silenced his thoughts, and young hobbit voices drifted into his head.  
  
"Did you see Legolas earlier on?"  
  
"Of course I did, how could you miss him? What do you suppose he was upset about?"  
  
"Something Gandalf said, but even Strider doesn't know."  
  
"Strider doesn't know?" Pippin repeated in disbelief.  
  
"No, he doesn't. But he knows there is something going on."  
  
"I always thought Strider knew everything."  
  
"It looks like not."  
  
"Yes. . ." after a moment, Pippin added, "Merry?"  
  
"What is it, Pip?"  
  
"He's all right, isn't he?"  
  
"Who? Strider?"  
  
"No! Legolas."  
  
"I don't know. I suppose. Do you think so?"  
  
"I hope he is. I don't know him well but he seems to be a nice enough fellow. Thanks, Merry. Good night."  
  
"Good night, Pip."  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
All right, I have no idea where that one came from. Was it okay? 


	4. The Pass of Caradhras

Disclaimer: I do not own anything you recognize. I do not take credit for anything you recognize. Please do not sue me.  
  
Author's Note: I'm gong away for the weekend, (coming home Monday) so I won't be on fanfiction again for about four days and felt that I ought to leave something for you guys.  
  
Sugar Addict: What, are implying that I might stop writing? Anyway, thanks! Plus which for all of those people who did not notice the sequel there is a note at the end of Cold Steel.  
  
Vana Burke: Yes, actually, he is eighty seven. He lives to be two hundred and ten years old. Numenoreans have a long lifespan.  
  
Miss No Name: Thanks for reviewing (and I'm fine, thank you for asking, even if you did assume the answer) and you are welcome concerning quick updates.  
  
Wicked Misty: Thanks!  
  
Dream Catcher: Yes! Some criticism from you at last! I need to do better with dialogue! And you with spelling (you wrote "dialog")! There is an old rift between Elves and Dwarves, Gimli has never heard that the dwarves caused it, Legolas has never heard that the Elves caused it, and Aragorn has heard both. I am an atheist, but you are not boring. Do not try to be boring, please! Thanks for reading and all. After all, this story was mostly written to teach you how to deal with masochists. (not that you know any, of course. . .)  
  
Padfoots Girl: Thanks and I will.  
  
Cool Girl Chic 16: Thanks and glad you enjoyed it.  
  
Evil Spapple Pie: Well, you try telling Legolas that! He thinks most things are his fault.  
  
Baby: Hmm. . .well, that is one way to help but talking is different from being a puppet. You have to want to tell the other person.  
  
Passion Wind: Thanks and okay!  
  
Lady Daine: Thanks! It does not change perspective at all, the entire story is written third-person but basically by Legolas, as The Hobbit is written by Bilbo. He heard Merry and Pippin talking.  
  
Gwyn: That is a lot of what I had in mind, but with some changes in it. As for Lothlorien, Galadriel is as good a person as any to be upset around, for she seems to be patient and caring (in the book if not the movie). Good luck with your midterms!  
  
Daylight: Thanks and okay!  
  
Lirenel: It's also easier to write about the Fellowship. With an established plot one can focus more on characters and such.  
  
Erhothwen: Go ahead and pride yourself, Elrohir, you are a great friend and you deserve to be a bit proud for that. **sticks out tongue at Erhothwen** The hobbits and Gimli do not have huge roles in this story but they are not ignored! Elladan, you did not nearly fall, you did fall. Estel, you are not fat, you just whammed into him. Like a dog! And Legolas, all right, I will!  
  
Karate Elf: Thanks!!!  
  
Kaimelieamin: Yes, that might help. You shall find out what would happen if he finds out!  
  
Thanks again to all my reviewers!  
  
*****  
  
The company had halted for a few days' rest, it seemed: they would not be going on for yet another full day and night. Legolas was all right with this, while he did not mind any pace he did not object to rest, either. The hobbits at once set about making food, as this seemed to be a hobbit's favorite thing to do: eat! Mithrandir had taken out his pipe and was smoking, which was equally perhaps his favorite thing to do. Gimli the Dwarf had abandoned his favorite past time of complaining and was polishing his axe, telling a fancy tale of it, as well.  
  
"Many an orc this blade has cut down, and many a warg has cowered at the sight of it indeed," Gimli muttered. Merry and Pippin were transfixed with this falsity, but Legolas was not. The Dwarf has joined to out-do me, no kindness shall I show to him.  
  
"I believe that," Legolas announced.  
  
"Do you now? An Elf of sense!" remarked the Dwarf.  
  
"Indeed. If, that is, in Dwarfish orc means shrub and warg means beetles," Legolas continued. Gimli looked as though his eye might pop out of their sockets.  
  
"What? Why I never heard such blasphemy!"  
  
"You have heard it now, though blasphemy I would call it not," Legolas returned.  
  
"Why--! I find now a decent time to put my blade to good use!" threatened Gimli. He raised his axe ready to strike, but he blinked and as he did Legolas, quick as a flash, strung his bow and at the dwarf's head pointed an arrow.  
  
"Gimli! Legolas! This company was not formed for the sake of battle but to prevent it," Mithrandir scolded. "Come now, lower your weapons."  
  
Legolas burned, feeling like a young boy. One thing was certain, he would get that Dwarf. Gimli sauntered off, and Legolas plunked onto a stone. "Do you enjoy confrontation?"  
  
Who had asked that? Oh, it was the Man, Boromir. "I do not," Legolas snapped.  
  
"I meant no offense. Surely I do not enjoy fighting. I ask only because you and the Dwarf--" Boromir tried to explain, but Legolas interrupted him quickly.  
  
"He started it."  
  
Boromir smiled as though to say 'you sound like my little brother', but kept quiet. He glanced over at Merry and Pippin, who were talking and joking, and went to join them. Well, good! Legolas thought. At least he'll leave me alone. "You know, it would not hurt to give the others a small chance." That old, papery voice could belong to only one person.  
  
"What for?" Legolas wanted to know, in bad spirits.  
  
"For the sake of Middle Earth, perhaps," Mithrandir suggested, "or simply because they are not bad people. Maybe because you have enough troubles without bringing more upon ourself?"  
  
"I never did apologize to you, Mithrandir, for the way I spoke before. That was un-called for. Elrohir only cares about me, and even if it is a little offensive that he asked you to look after me as if I were a child. . ."  
  
At this a light of laughter shone in the old wizard's eyes. "No, you did not, but I knew that you meant to. But tell me, why have you come on this quest, Legolas?"  
  
"To destroy the last great evil left in all Middle Earth," Legolas replied automatically.  
  
"Oh?" Mithrandir asked, eyebrows raised, "in Elrond's words this is so, but I think it was a different reason." He nodded in the direction of Aragorn, who had wandered off and now was back, leaning against a tree and watching the others. "He is grown now and does not need a big brother to look after him, yet it makes you feel better to know that just in case. . ."  
  
Legolas realized how truly dense he had been. He was angry at someone for doing the exact same thing as him! He chuckled slightly, for indeed it was funny. Merry then called up to Strider, "What is the matter, Strider? What are you looking for? Do you miss the East Wind?"  
  
This last question may have been a joke, but Aragorn did not see this as being so. "No indeed, but I miss something." He described to the others the silence he heard, the silence of animals and such. No birdcalls resounded and no coyotes howled any longer. Mithrandir wrote this off to the surprise of seeing the group, so many after so long with no one.  
  
"I hope that that is so, but I have a sense of watchfulness, and of fear, that I have never felt before," Aragorn said.  
  
"Then we must be careful. If you bring a Ranger with you, it is well to pay attention to him, especially if that Ranger is Aragorn." Mithrandir's last comment, suspected Legolas, was directed at him, although he did not say so.  
  
Legolas knew things to be different than Mithrandir had said about the surprise of the land. The grass beneath his feet did not whisper, and the time when he had taken but one unclad step in it he had felt as if death were whispering secrets in his ears, and fell to the ground, jamming his shoes back on. Not again had he risked unprotected confrontation. The stones were not as frightening, for they had more and deeper memories, though dark not nearly as dark as the great emptiness. All this land was beginning to take its toll, and exhaustion along with some amount of depression crept upon him.  
  
*****  
  
A squaking sound was heard, and Legolas's eyes sprang open. The rest of his body did not move, he lay flat and still on the ground. In the air his Elf eyes picked up a whole herd of black crows. It was Sam's watch, but Legolas knew Aragorn had taken the watch with him. He knows what to do, Legolas told himself to keep from springing to his feet. When the crows had gone from what he gauged was the view of a Man, Legolas pricked up his ears so as to hear what went on.  
  
"Gandalf, there were crows, crebain foreign to this land, from Dunland or Fangorn. I thought we ought to move again this evening, for surely all of Hollin has been observed. This land is not wholesome for us any longer."  
  
"Then so is Redhorn Gate, and how we can get over that without being seen I cannot imagine. But we will think of that when we must. As for moving as soon as it is dark, I am afraid you are right."  
  
"Luckily our fire made little smoke, and burned low before the crows came. It must be put out and not lit again." At this he seemed to remember the young hobbit, standing nervously by. "You may as well get to sleep while you can, Sam. We'll be going on soon." When Sam had fallen asleep Legolas considered standing and joining Aragorn and Mithrandir, but somehow felt that it would be best if he did not.  
  
*****  
  
They carried on. Something passed over them again that night and while the others debated what it was, Legolas with his Elf eyes gazed upwards and saw the crebain yet again. Ahead of him Legolas saw well their destination, and for him the march onwards was somewhat easier, for his mark was in sight. Three days time passed and the mountain Caradhras was reached.  
  
Mithrandir drew Aragorn aside and spoke to him, asking what Aragorn now thought of the course the Ranger had chosen. Aragorn replied to this, "I think no good of our course from beginning to end, as you well know, Gandalf." He continued, but Legolas noticed that Frodo was listening in as well and instantaneously blushed.  
  
"Frodo," Legolas called softly, "may I please speak with you?" Way to go, Greenleaf! He told himself. What will you say to the Halfling? Frodo diverted his attention from Mithrandir and Aragorn, peering at Legolas. "Frodo. . .are you all right? You seem a bit ill." Blatant lie, stupid, he knows you are lying!  
  
"No, I'm quite fine. Thank you for your concern."  
  
Frodo walked off, and Legolas exhaled, biting his lip. That had gone badly. Muddling everything up again, Elf, you just love trouble don't you, he scolded. Oh, stop that, it isn't true. You did your best. He was drawn out of thought by a hand on his shoulder. "Thank you for that," Aragorn said.  
  
"I was listening, as well," Legolas admitted.  
  
"I know," Aragorn shrugged, "I expected that. Thank you for distracting Frodo, it is much appreciated. To your ears the words exchanged between Gandalf and I would evoke only comprehension, perhaps some confusion, but in the wrong hands. . .Frodo means well, but he might have frightened all the Halflings then with what he heard."  
  
Then Gimli, Boromir, and the four hobbits began to eat breakfast, Pippin mumbling about how only one was not sufficient. Legolas supposed that he may as well join them. Mithrandir and Aragorn wandered off and looked at the mountain. Upon their return it was announced that Caradhras would be crossed.  
  
"If I may," began Boromir. Legolas saw now that he was not, as earlier suspected, cocky and arrogant. Indeed all this Man meant was to lend a hand where he might. Now he suggested bringing wood. Mithrandir agreed, so long at the wood was never burned.  
  
*****  
  
As soon as the snowdrifts upon the mountain, snow falling so thickly, were a foot high Legolas hopped lightly upon them, taking his own time and trying to stay as slow as the others. He wished he could have carried one of the halflings with him, for they looked rather miserable, but that would not work out as they would sink into the snow.  
  
"This is what I feared. What do you say of your road now, Aragorn?" Mithrandir asked.  
  
"I say what I said before!" Replied Aragorn, "that I feared it also, but not so much as other things. This snow is unusual, Gandalf, for we are yet on low paths that should all winter remain open to us."  
  
Boromir was the one to put tongue to the thoughts on everyone's mind. "I wonder if this is some contrivance of the enemy." He explained that where he came from it was said that he could control the weather.  
  
"His arm has grown long indeed if he can draw snow from the north to trouble us here three hundred leagues away," said Gimli the Dwarf.  
  
Mithrandir muttered, distinguishable only to Legolas, "His arm has grown long."  
  
*****  
  
"This will be the death of the halflings, Gandalf!"  
  
Legolas remained out of the discussion then, for snow was no obstacle for Elven feet, and lightly he could dance upon the drifts. The company had halted now, taking as much shelter as possible, and were debating what to do. Boromir had defended the halflings, as he always did. Mithrandir passed around miruvor, which Legolas declined for he was quite fine.  
  
Now fire had been brought up. Again Mithrandir gave in and lit a fire with magic, though he grumbled about it, and not without reason. "I may as well have written 'Gandalf is here'," the old wizard observed, and while this was true there was nothing to be done about it now. One thing was for sure: the company had to retreat. How could this be done?  
  
"If Gandalf could go before us with a flame, he could melt a path for you," Legolas observed, having dropped down from his perch on the snow to partake in the discussion.  
  
"If Elves could fly over mountains, they might fetch the Sun to save us," Mithrandir replied. Legolas supposed that, if it were possible to actually move the Sun, he well could make it round the mountain, over snow, and back, but he kept this thought to himself. "I cannot burn snow."  
  
Aragorn and Boromir began to make a path in the snow, one that the others might follow. The hobbits huddled together now, for warmth or perhaps they were afraid. Legolas sat in the snow for a while. He liked the snow, it was new-fallen, so harbor memories not of Elves or animals other, but only space for memory, not space where memory had been. Then he leapt to his feet and explained that he was off. With a smirk towards Mithrandir he added, "I go to fetch the Sun!" And as a man on a mission he sped forth.  
  
Around the rocky bend Legolas ran, passing Aragorn and Boromir, who did not notice him at all. Legolas stopped his run in exchange for a slight trot. He trotted for a bit until he came upon the greatest of all the snow drifts he had seen so far. "By the Valar," he said, "if this is not the worst truly, truly the others are doomed." He then trotted on farther and saw that indeed it was the worst, after that the snow quickly sloped down to nothing. He turned back there.  
  
"This is hopeless. As thick as a house this one must be. Aragorn, let us turn back and tell the others. We cannot make our way through this," Boromir said.  
  
"Do you think there is not any chance at all?" Aragorn asked with hope. Boromir responded that there was no hope.  
  
"Despondent friends!" cried Legolas. "You have no reason to dismay, this is but the width of a wall. Through it and you are freed of your burden." Then he ambled back towards the others. Aragorn and Boromir came back not much later. Legolas described the situation to them, the deepest drift then the snow was as good as gone.  
  
The taller of the company, and Gimli, made their way ought on their feet. Legolas had a simple task of it. The hobbits had to be carried. Finally it was all finished with, and they stumbled forth from Caradhras, defeated.  
  
As with hope and valiant thoughts the nine had set out from Rivendell, now with despair and defeat they trudged away from Caradhras. 


	5. The Mines of Moria

Disclaimer: Nope, not mine.  
  
Sorry this has taken so long, and sorry that it is movie-verse. I seem to have misplaced my copy of "Fellowship", but I promise a book-verse chapter next. Better movie than nothing, right?  
  
Crazy/evil: Meanie! Just kidding. And thank you  
  
Golden Rose: Thanks! And sorry it's taken so long, I was on vacation and not able to type!!  
  
Tom: Oh. . .k. . .I suppose that's a complement?  
  
Erothwen: Sorry, Legolas, but there is some angst coming up. . .really bad angst. . .don't worry, no matter who says that line you'll get an update!  
  
Karate Elf: Thank you. Moria, coming up. . .  
  
Sugar Addict: Okay!  
  
Crys Ritter: You're welcome!  
  
Soul Searcher Arbariel: Thanks a lot. . .all my Legolas stories get that comment! Oh, wait. . .that's because he's so damn hot! **smacks Legolas for being so attractive** So sorry about your computer, glad it's been fixed.  
  
Cool Girl Chic 16: Well, it is about Legolas's emotions throughout the books, or the fellowship if people want me to stop there. In the previous fic he was cutting his arms and legs for emotional relief, and this is sort of. . .what happens after.  
  
Padfoots Girl: Thanks and okay.  
  
Kaimelieamin: Thanks! And worry not, the angst approaches. . .  
  
Elven Baby Evenstar: No, you certainly were not very coherent. . .thanks!  
  
Lil*bee: Generally one says that on the newest chapter, but all right I will!  
  
Gwyn: Well, growing depression. . .sometimes has growth spurts. Yeah, you basically know exactly what's going to happen. But with a few little twists in there. . .  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
*****  
  
"The walls. . .of Moria!" Gimli gasped, reverent. It was a great wall indeed, though, Legolas thought, more like a mountain than anything else, a wall of a mountain next to a small, vile lake. He was somewhat afraid of what lay ahead for him, not liking such confinement as mines and caverns. He stood back and observed as Mithrandir found the ithilden door.  
  
"What does it say, Gandalf?" asked Frodo.  
  
"These are the doors of Durin, Lord of Moria. Speak, friend, and enter," Mithrandir answered.  
  
"What do you suppose that means?" Merry asked.  
  
"Well, it's quite simple. If you are friend you speak the password and the doors will open." Mithrandir said this in a way that suggested he was surely a friend. Then, as if to prove this, he muttered a few words of Dwarfish. Nothing happened.  
  
"What are you going to do now?" Pippin asked.  
  
"Knock your head against these doors, Peregrin Took! And if that does not break them at least I will spared foolish questions for a few moments, and I may think," Mithrandir replied angrily. Pippin walked off, and Legolas wanted to comfort the little hobbit, tell him that Mithrandir yelled at everyone like that, but instead Legolas stayed where he was.  
  
An hour passed, and the doors remained shut. Mithrandir sat on a large rock, dejected, speaking of what he once knew. Gimli stared at the door in quiet reverence. The hobbits stood about, Samwise saddened because Aragorn had sent Bill the pony off. Out of boredom Pippin began tossing stone into the lake, each landing with a depressing splash. "Do not disturb the water!" Aragorn said, in what Legolas considered his most frightening voice. Pippin obeyed.  
  
"It's a riddle!" Frodo said, jumping to his feet. As he did so Legolas noticed a ripple in the water, and hoped Frodo had solved the riddle as he backed against the wall. "Speak friend and enter. Gandalf, what's the Elvish word for friend?"  
  
"Mellon," Legolas muttered. "Oh, I do hate the thought of entering those caves, but not as much as I hate that vile lake. What resides within?" No one heard his whisper, but there was a great rumbling from within the mountain.  
  
"Mellon," Gandalf said, louder, and the doors opened. The company half- assembled, entering the caves. Legolas felt slightly uncomfortable, but shoved the thought aside.  
  
"Soon, Master Elf, you will enjoy the fabled hospitality of the Dwarves!" Gimli boasted. Legolas did not think this was so, it was near to impossible to see in those caves save for Elven eyes. "Roaring fires, ripe meat off the bone, malt beer. . ." Forest fires, bloody bones, Legolas thought, but he was not averse to malt beer, although he preferred ale. When in Gondor, do as the Gondorians do, Legolas reminded himself of the old saying. "This is the home of my cousin Balin and they call it a mine! A mine!" Gimli laughed at this.  
  
"This is no mine," Boromir agreed. "It is a tomb!" The four hobbits noticed a carcass by their feet and stepped back. Gimli gave a cry of anguish and denial, observing the bodies strewn about the floor. Legolas knelt and pulled an arrow from one of the Dwarves. Being an archer, he could tell one kind of arrow from another. These were some he feared.  
  
"Goblins!"  
  
Boromir drew his sword, but he had had enough. "We make for the Gap of Rohan," he said, backing away, "we should never have come here." Suddenly there was a shout from behind them.  
  
"Strider! Aragorn!" It was the hobbits. Aragorn turned and dashed off, just in time for the Watcher in the water to grab Frodo and swing him into the air. Boromir and Aragorn were at it with their swords at once, Legolas shooting arrows where he saw they would be the most affective. Finally managing to slash off the proper tentacle, Aragorn caught Frodo as he plummeted to the ground.  
  
"Legolas!" Boromir shouted, but Legolas was shooting like mad already. The Watcher made an attempt at regaining the ringbearer, then seemed to decide against and ripped the doors from their holdings on the wall. Stones piled in. The hobbits ran back, grouping together. Legolas put a hand on Aragorn's shoulder, only just managing not to do or say anything that would utterly embarrass Aragorn.  
  
"We now have but one choice. We must face the long dark of Moria," Mithrandir prophesied gloomily.  
  
*****  
  
"Shh! Gandalf's thinking!"  
  
"Merry?"  
  
"Yes, Pippin?"  
  
"I'm hungry."  
  
Legolas smiled. The young hobbits probably had no idea how cute they actually were. For a moment he forgot how upset he was. . .then it came back to him. The Watcher. It had been his fault. . .if he had only be there, had only been more accurate. . .he could have killed it. He could have gotten rid of it. It was his fault that they had to journey through Moria. He had done something quite awful. . .  
  
"It will not be long, Legolas. Do not worry. This is but a passing step of our journey."  
  
"Hm?" Legolas asked. It was as if Aragorn had known exactly what he had been thinking. Now the Ranger sat beside Legolas, and he seemed to Legolas very old.  
  
"These mines. . .we will not be in them long. I know you hate them."  
  
Aragorn was looking after him. That was quite ironic, Legolas really only came to make sure that Aragorn was all right, yet now Mithrandir and Aragorn were looking out for. Perhaps he should tell Aragorn why he came in the first place, maybe even tell him about what had happened all those years ago. . .Legolas's heart sped up as he opened his mouth to speak.  
  
"It's this way!" Mithrandir said.  
  
"He's remembered!" Pippin said, jumping to his feet.  
  
"No. The air doesn't smell so foul down here. . ."  
  
As the others slowly left, Aragorn let his hand rest on Legolas's shoulder for a moment longer. "What is it?"  
  
"We should go," Legolas said, standing up and shrugging off Aragorn's hand. Aragorn gave him a look of offense. He had only meant to help; then Aragorn stood and together the two followed the others. Legolas was glad when he realized that Aragorn understood the depth of what Legolas had tried to say, and did not judge or begrudge him for his inability to say it.  
  
*****  
  
"No! No!"  
  
"Gimli!"  
  
The Dwarf paid no heed, running off. The others followed, finding Gimli in tears beside a stone tomb. Mithrandir read off the epitath, noting the death of Balin, and commented, "He is dead then." A book of Dwafish ruins lay in the hands of a nearby carcass. Handing his hat and staff to Pippin, Mithrandir picked up the book and began reading.  
  
"We must move on. We cannot linger here!" Legolas whispered to Aragorn, who nodded slightly, but gave him a look as if to say that they should, out of courtesy for the Dwarf, wait a few moments. Boromir did his best to comfort the anguished Gimli.  
  
"The have taken the third hall. . .we cannot get out. . .we cannot get out. . .they are coming."  
  
Pippin had no patience for such things. Noticing something, he turned, twisting an arrowhead from the hand of a skeleton. The skeleton fell down the well on which it sat, drawing after it a long chain. The others fell silent, staring at the hobbit, who turned away, squeezing his eyes shut in apprehension. "Fool of a Took! Throw yourself in next time and rid us of your stupidity!"  
  
That, Legolas thought, was a bit harsh, but he kept silent. Drums could be heard, and ugly screams. "Yrch!" Legolas muttered. An arrow pierced the door, and Boromir peered out, stating, "the have a cave troll!"  
  
"Bar the door!" someone called, and Aragorn and Boromir did. They were quite a pair, those two, Legolas noted that there was hardly a task they could not accomplish. In seconds the orcs and their troll had arrived. The doors provided no obstacle to them, but in the perhaps sixty seconds that they took to break in an eternity reigned. Aragorn and Legolas had arrows nocked and were ready to shoot, Boromir beside then twirled his sword. Finally, as if mercifully, the orcs broke the doors and streamed in. Legolas fired arrow after arrow, watching orcs fall. Gimli shouted with rage as he tore down orc after orc with his axe. The hobbits had begun by hiding behind Mithrandir, who no longer seemed at all mad at Pippin, but now were fending for themselves.  
  
"I think I'm getting the hang of this," Sam said, and Legolas glanced at him for half a second and smiled. Sam had decided that a frying pan would be his weapon, and was hitting the orcs about the head. A cave troll, however, is not a foe to face with a frying pan, and knocked Sam to the ground. As the troll was about to crush the hobbit beneath his foot, Boromir and Aragorn grabbed the chain about its neck and pulled back on it, distracting the troll. When it realized what was happening the troll jerk the chain, flinging Boromir against a wall. Boromir sat up shaking his head.  
  
As the troll noticed Gimli, who had flung an axe into its chest, it set after him, swinging its great mace at anything, even orcs. Legolas had just run an arrow through some orcs with his bare hands, and was unoccupied for the moment. He placed two arrows in his bow and fired them. The enraged cave troll howled and turned to Legolas, who mouthed a curse as he ducked the flying mace.  
  
Frodo hid from the cave troll behind a pillar, where his cousins had placed him. The troll tried hard to find him, and finally did, sticking a spear beneath his ribs. Merry and Pippin gave a great cry as they jumped at the troll. Legolas noticed the chain around the troll's neck and with Elven grace dashed up it, firing an arrow between the troll's eyes. Somewhere along the way the troll fell, crushing the few orcs left. Legolas jumped down from its head, slowly approaching Frodo, but keeping his distance.  
  
Suddenly their dead ringbearer coughed and sat up. "It's all right. I'm not hurt," he said, to everyone's amazement.  
  
"You should be dead," Aragorn informed him. "That spear could have skewered a wild boar." (author's note: try saying that ten times fast! It's impossible!) Frodo drew back his shirt, and beneath it was wearing--  
  
"Mithril," Gimli breathed. But there was little time for anything more, as there were orcs coming. Their calls echoed throughout the chamber of death, and the company had to head on.  
  
Orcs and goblins surrounded them on all sides, coming from the ground and the ceiling. Only the light from Mithrandir's staff held them at bay. All nine were nearing exhaustion, but they forgot that, brushed sweaty clumps of hair from their eyes, and wielded their weapons with proud fear. And then. . .they fled. Something evil approached, something worse. . .  
  
Light poured in. Legolas frantically searched for something to aim at, moving his bow this way and that, then finally lowering it. "What is this new devilry?" asked Boromir, almost rhetorically, in a low voice.  
  
"A balrog. A demon of the ancient world." At Mithrandir's words comprehension sparked in Legolas's mind, and he was afraid, the kind of fear that makes you want to cry. The same fear was mirror in Aragorn's eyes, though he steadied his breathing and hid it far better. Even the hobbits, who knew nothing of balrogs, knew from Mithrandir's tone how evil they were. "This foe is beyond any of you. Run!"  
  
Boromir did not realize where the floor ended, and nearly fell off, into the giant pit only inches before him. Legolas ran up to him and pulled him back, a move which succeeded; both men landed in a heap on the stairs. As they picked themselves up Mithrandir leaned on Aragorn in exhaustion, then turned to him. "Lead them on, Aragorn. The bridge is near," he instructed. Aragorn stepped forward, as if to help Mithrandir and protest that they would not leave him there. Mithrandir shoved him away, commanding, "Do as I say!"  
  
Aragorn simply ran on, not knowing which words to protest with. The others followed him. The stairway twisted and turned, and they were careful not to fall. Mithrandir was still with them, but no long leading. At a gap in the stairs they paused. Legolas hopped lightly across, and Mithrandir followed, though not as effortlessly. Boromir grabbed Merry and together they jumped, landing safely. The stairs behind them broke, enlarging the jump. Orcs fired at them mercilessly. Legolas returned their fire, but being only one Elf could hardly keep up.  
  
"Pippin!" Aragorn called, then he grabbed the hobbit and threw him. Pippin was caught off guard, but landed all right. "Gimli!"  
  
"Nobody tosses a Dwarf!" he protested, then jumped across himself. His landing was precarious, and Legolas grabbed his beard to steady him. "Not the beard! Not the beard!" Finally Gimli was safe. Now only Aragorn and Frodo remained across the gap. Legolas was sweating with nerves. If Aragorn didn't make it, he would be an utter failure. Aragorn and Frodo jumped, and for a second Legolas was sure that they would not make it, but then, with a crash they did. Aragorn slammed into Legolas, who hugged him, unable to help himself, then spun around and ran on.  
  
*****  
  
"You cannot pass! I am the servant of the secret fire, wielder of the flame of Anor. Go back to the shadow, flame of Udun!" Mithrandir could be a commanding figure when he wanted to be. Now he surely was, standing without fear before the balrog. The balrog opposed him, but still he stood. It seemed as if so long as his courage held out, the balrog could do nothing. The balrog seemed not to know this, and there was a great crash as two great powers met. The bridge crumbled and fell, taking the creature with it.  
  
Mithrandir turned, and from the look on his face the others could see how much of a drain his tangle with the balrog had been. The balrog fell now, but it flicked its whip of flame and, catching Mithrandir around the ankles, pulled him down into the depths. "Gandalf!" Frodo cried trying to run to him. Boromir caught him, knowing that losing one member of the company was terrible, but the ringbearer could not be compromised.  
  
"Fly you fools!" And he fell.  
  
Painful was the last instruction of their leader, but the eight remaining members of the company followed this direction, running for their lives. In the sunlight once more there was no strength left in them. Sam crumpled to the ground. Not to far from him Pippin was lying, Merry beside him offering what little comfort he could. Boromir restrained Gimli, who pulled towards the mines. All had tears in their eyes. Legolas felt the pain too nearly to comprehend it, let alone act upon it. Aragorn stood before them, dry-eyed, cleaning his sword. He was their leader now.  
  
"Legolas, Boromir. Get them up."  
  
"Give them a moment, for pity's sake!" Boromir protested. Aragorn shook his head.  
  
"By nightfall these hills will be swarming with orcs. We must reach the woods of Lothlorien. Come, Legolas, Boromir. Gimli, get them up."  
  
Legolas heard his words but could not follow them. He could hardly keep on his own feet. What had he done? He could have killed the Watcher, or fired a shot at the balrog to distract him. Instead he had stood by, helplessly, and done nothing. It was all his fault.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Oh my. . .poor Legolas. . .I just want everyone to know how much fun I had writing the cave troll sequence. I would watch about thirty seconds in my sister's room, pause it, run into my room to type it up, then go back and so on and so forth. It was cool. Hope you liked reading as much as I liked writing this. 


	6. Lothlorien

Disclaimer: Anything recognizable or worth owning is not mine. A.k.a. all I own is the organization of these words.  
  
Tbiris: Thanks. I actually know that nocked is used for arrows, but my computer doesn't so it automatically corrected that.  
  
Soulsearcher- Arbariel: Yes, lovely guilt. . .maybe he will, maybe he won't, maybe this chapter answers your question. Yeah, your parents would be worried. . .no matter!  
  
Just Jill: What do you mean by "not exactly what you'd thought of"? Thanks!  
  
Gwyn: That bit was, yes. Maybe maybe maybe!!! **grins** answering would be spoilers. . .  
  
Sugar Addict: Yeah, I noticed that after I had posted. . .tried to take it out, but the computer wouldn't post the re-done chapter! Watching only one character changes your perception of the film entirely. . .like Legolas hiding behind Aragorn at one bit, and the shooting thing with the balrog.  
  
Earendil - Baby: **is very disturbed** thanks!  
  
Forest Elfin: Oh. . .k. . .  
  
Child of Magick: It will probably go all through Lord of the Rings, really depending on what people want. Thanks!  
  
Callisto Firestarter: Thanks. Yes, he does.  
  
Erhothwen: Oy! Quit choking my characters! Hey, you finally got to say your line! Yay!  
  
Lady- Daine: Well, they don't know that he's only going for a wardrobe change. Do you know where that word comes from? It's a fascinating story.  
  
Zero Cool: Yes, he does. Maybe he will, maybe he won't harm himself again. Thanks!  
  
Ola: Yeah, that repition was an accident. . .(stupid author pressed "c" instead of "x") thanks!  
  
Golden Rose: More chapter, you think? Really? Hmm, that's a difficult one to improve. . .j/k.  
  
Dream Catcher: Okay, I'll tell him. . .me: Oy, Leggy! It's not your fault! Legolas: **sobs** me: some Elves just never learn. . .  
  
Goma Ryu: All right. You're welcome!  
  
Padfoots Girl: Thanks and okay!  
  
Saera: Legolas works better for getting updates. . .JUST KIDDING!  
  
Legolas Girl 86: Heh, it was so obvious? Oh, well. I'll try to make him feel better, but recently he's just been so stubborn and inconsolable. . .You're welcome! Thanks for being a good reviewer!  
  
  
  
Thanks majorly to everyone who reviewed! And I know a few sentences were repeated in the last chapter, I am trying to fix that.  
  
  
  
*****  
  
The others had fallen to sleep, but even in the lands of Elves Legolas could find no rest. I as good as killed him, Legolas thought. Perhaps I could not have slain the balrog, but one well-placed arrow to slow or distract him. . .But not to fear, The Lady will see. She will know and she will judge me.  
  
What had Aragorn said about her? It had been so many years ago. . ."The Lady knows the guilty, the evil, and she does not welcome them." She would see Legolas for what he was. Soundly did he sleep then, for he knew it was his last night in Lorien.  
  
*****  
  
The company followed Haldir deeper into Lorien. Legolas felt his judgment approaching, and was gleeful, almost euphoric. A single doubt nagged at the back of his mind: what if he was not allowed to stay with the fellowship? Don't be silly, he told himself, they will be better off without you.  
  
*****  
  
"Gandalf the Grey set out with the company, but did not pass the borders of this land. Now tell us where he is; for I much desired to speak with him again."  
  
"Gandalf the Grey fell into shadow. He remained in Moria, and did not escape."  
  
Nice, Legolas thought, spoken without blame. But folly, all here know where blame is due. Celeborn asked Haldir why no word of this had been brought to him. Legolas jumped to his friend's defense. "Haldir knew nothing of this. First we were too tired, and danger too near, then for a time we set aside our grief on the fair paths of Lothlorien." Here his guilt deepened. What right had he to forget his crimes? Now the discussion went on around Legolas, each syllable a knife in his heart.  
  
The Fellowship was dismissed to go and rest. Legolas blinked in confusion. Had he not heard? Wasn't she angry with him? "Stay but a moment, Legolas Greenleaf," Galadriel requested, and he did. Surely she was only sparing him the humiliation of being chastised before his friends, not that it mattered with such little pride. Now only the two Elves remained. "Is there something you wish to say?"  
  
"Lady?" she had asked him to stay, not the other way around.  
  
"Nothing? Not some question? I know your thoughts were not for me to see, and so I have not seen them. Is there something troubling you? Nay, Legolas," she added quickly, "speak not of protecting or burdening me."  
  
"I have naught to say, Lady. Naught but thank you for this opportunity."  
  
"You may always seek me out, should you think of something."  
  
"Thank you." Though of course he would never dream of it.  
  
"Go now and find your companions. Good-night, child."  
  
*****  
  
Moonlight has a magic effect on steel, Legolas thought, tilting his blade to catch the gleam. How could the Lady have let him down like that? Was it possible that she did not see how evil he was? Perhaps this was her punishment for him: facing the others. Slowly he brought the blade to his flesh, sighing with relief.  
  
"Legolas!" The sound startled him. Legolas dropped the knife, which nicked his arm before falling to the ground.  
  
"Is something wrong?" Legolas asked.  
  
"Are you all right?" Aragorn asked, ignoring the first question and reaching for Legolas's bleeding arm. "What were you doing out here?"  
  
"I was just sharpening my knife. I'm fine, Aragorn," Legolas answered, drawing back his arm and pushing his sleeve down over it.  
  
"You're bleeding," Aragorn observed. "I'm sorry. Let me see the cut."  
  
Let him? Never. Legolas trusted Aragorn and he would follow him into Mordor, but this. . .no. He was only a child, far too young. "It's not too bad," Legolas said.  
  
"You can trust me, Legolas," Aragorn insisted, reaching again for the hurt appendage.  
  
"Estel!" Legolas said angrily. That had not been intentional. A look of pain and of comprehension crossed Aragorn's face. Stooping he gathered up the knife and thrust it towards Legolas, then without a word he walked away.  
  
Great job, Legolas told himself sarcastically. What was I to do? I cannot tell him, it would not be right. And rejecting him like that was? He only cares about you, though only the Valar know why. And I only care about him!  
  
Why do you think Mithrandir chose him to lead the company? Aragorn is far more trustworthy than you are. That is not so! Mithrandir chose him for his leadership history, maybe even to tell me to trust him. . .there, you stupid. You've gone against Mithrandir's wishes already.  
  
I can't take this any long, Legolas realized. Aragorn. . .he was supposed to trust Aragorn. Well, look what Aragorn had told him to do. The knife reflected the moonlight as Legolas brought it down to his flesh. The point was sharp as could be, and it took little effort for Legolas to puncture the flesh, then draw the point across. . ."No!" In anger he threw the knife, and it stuck out of a tree at a right angle. He ripped out his other two knives, throwing them similarly, and he ran away.  
  
"Legolas," a light, musical voice intoned. He froze, and turned slowly. Galadriel stood between two trees, her golden hair falling loosely over shoulders clad in material of an almost uncanny white. Her face held no scorn or judgment, but her eyes were so piercing Legolas could not run now. "Is there nothing you wish to tell me, now?"  
  
"Lady," Legolas managed to gasp before falling to his knees sobbing. Galadriel caught him before he hit the ground, and like a small child Legolas buried his face in her shoulder and cried hard for a long time. "I didn't mean it, I didn't, it was only supposed to affect me," he sobbed, voice bubbly. "It wasn't supposed to affect him, I didn't mean to hurt him, I didn't mean to."  
  
"No one thinks you did, my child."  
  
"Yes, yes they do. I killed him, Lady. If not for me, Mithrandir would still be alive today."  
  
"Mithrandir would not be alive today for anything. None of us can change the will of the Valar, not even the mightiest or the wisest. Come, Legolas," Galadriel said, lifting his head, "it is time to behave like the warrior you are."  
  
"Yes, Lady," Legolas said, brushing away his tears and keeping the rest at bay.  
  
"You have something to resolve with Aragorn, do you not?" she asked, trying to prod him in the right direction without being too blatant about it.  
  
"That I do, Lady, but he has no reason to forgive me."  
  
"Legolas," she had hoped it would not come to this, but her voice had hardened, and she was no longer the same woman upon whose shoulder Legolas had shed endless tears only moments before. "You are a warrior, a messenger of Mirkwood forest, and most importantly you are a member of this company. This childish behavior will not do. Go to them now, Legolas. The sun rises, and they with it. And, Legolas. . .there are to be no more temper tantrums in this forest," she added, handing him his three knives.  
  
"Yes, Lady," Legolas said, well enough chastised. True to her word, the sun rose. He had not realized he had cried so long. He ducked his head and headed back to the Fellowship.  
  
*****  
  
"So Master Elf sees fit to join us!" Gimli the Dwarf exclaimed.  
  
"Forgive my absences, Master Dwarf, I took a walk to clear my mind."  
  
"Obviously you were awake throughout," Aragorn commented. "You look terrible."  
  
"Aragorn, I did find injury in these trees last night. Would you be so kind as to treat the cut?" Legolas asked as politely as he could.  
  
"I would be glad to, Legolas. Mellon-nin." Aragorn smiled at him, a closed- lipped, almost secret smile to let him know that things were well between them. Legolas rolled up his sleeve and held out his arm to Aragorn, who set about washing away the dried blood. "Oh. . .Legolas. . .how in Middle- earth. . .?" he ran a finger along Legolas's old cut, from many centuries ago.  
  
"It was a feral cat," Legolas employed the old lie. Elrohir had not believed him, but Aragorn took his word for it. "Is the new cut all right?"  
  
"It should be fine," Aragorn assured him, binding the wound. Legolas thanked him and stood, thinking about everything. . .  
  
"Mister Legolas?" A nervous voice asked.  
  
"Yes?" Legolas replied in a half-dream, looking around for the source of the voice.  
  
"Down here, sir," Pippin said. As soon as Legolas noticed him, Pippin said through giggles, "I challenge you to a duel," and he pointed his small sword at Legolas. Boromir was sparring with Merry and Gimli was eating breakfast with Frodo and Sam (hadn't Frodo and Sam already had breakfast?). Aragorn was watching him, and Legolas wanted to do something nice, so Legolas drew his knife.  
  
"All right, Pippin," he said. "But I should warn you. . .I'm told I fight like a feral cat."  
  
Aragorn froze, his lips parted in shocked and his eyes wide. As Pippin and Legolas sparred he moved only to sit, so as not to fall to the ground. A feral cat. . .that had been meant for him. Legolas was a feral cat. . .there had to be some mistake. Not Legolas, not his friend, not the Elf who had stood by him through so much. . .no. Noise and feeling all ceased, as suddenly in Aragorn's mind things snapped into place, and it was too much. He stood and walked mutely away, not hearing the calls of his friends asking where he was going.  
  
Out of hearing range of the company Aragorn fell against a tree, sliding down to the ground. "I can't do this. It's too much. . ." He did not cry, but he sat on his own thinking for a long time.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Sorry for the shortie! 


	7. Lothlorien, Part 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Lord of the Rings or any characters or places that can be recognized.  
  
Fairy lady: Hehe, thanks! Sorry this one took so long, but it's got a bit more to it.  
  
Regina bean: All hail caffeine. . .  
  
Alyssa-anime-angel: Thanks. I try to update as much as I can, this story has proved tricky, though.  
  
Earendil star: What's going to happen now? Well, it would be much more fun if I left you in suspense, wouldn't it? Yes, that's what I shall do. . .hehe, just kidding. Of course, I won't tell, either.  
  
Moro the Wolf God: The deal with the feral cat was that when Aragorn asked how Legolas got a certain scar, Legolas said it was a feral cat. When he refers to himself as a feral cat, he tells Aragorn that he gave himself that scar. Does that help?  
  
Java Galxy: Hehe, bookverse and movieverse. . .switching depending on how lazy I'm feeling. Thanks for your review.  
  
Zero cool: Aragorn will do what he thinks is best. This you must remember, for what seems right may not always be.  
  
YuZira: Thank you.  
  
Callisto Firestarter: Yes, he did. Good Aragorn **gives Aragorn a dog treat. Avoids getting head lobbed off by Anduril**  
  
Goma-Ryu: Hehe, sounds like a psychiatrist ad. Well, here's the next chapter. . .good luck, doctor demento! Just kidding, of course.  
  
Legolas Girl 86: Yes, Aragorn has figured it out. That is a good idea, but what's mind meld? And thank you very much.  
  
Tbiris: Yes, it's almost an insult to Aragorn that he needed a hint. Just kidding! Thanks, hope you like this next chapter.  
  
Erhothwen: Oh, yes, without Elrohir. . .or is he? Mwuhahahaha! You'll see what I mean. Thank you, Elladan, I have update, though less than soon. . .  
  
Wicked Misty: Thanks, and you should write up a pity list! My friend Smeagol has one, it's funny.  
  
Lirenel: Thanks and I will.  
  
Lady-Daine: Thanks, hopefully this update isn't too late. . .  
  
Queen of Shadows: It's not really something one gets over. It's something one moves on from, grows from. You'll see. . .Aragorn will do what he thinks is best, but remember no one is perfect. No, don't go into withdrawal! Here's another chapter. . .  
  
Soul searcher - arbariel: Thank you, Aragorn's thoughts will form later on. Sorry about your friends moving to Malaysia, why did they move?  
  
Becca: Freudian slip? No such thing.  
  
Saera: Aw, baby talk. . .Robin, the reviews have discovered our one weakness! Holy kryptonite, Batman!  
  
Sugar Addict: Aragorn already knows! Calm down. . .no more sugar! Hehehe. You typed "Logolas", that could be some snowboarder's nickname. You know how they have all those endorsements? As in, they wear logos? Oh my, I am so not funny. Anyway, hope you enjoy this chapter.  
  
Madie Ichyfingers: Thank you, hope the wait wasn't too long **ducks flying object**  
  
Estelle Yavetil: Thanks, hope the wait wasn't too bad.  
  
Fell in love with Sephy: Ah, sorry, I must try to update more. Thank you!  
  
Ola: The cat thing was on purpose. I don't believe in so-called "Freudian slips". Aragorn crumbles because Legolas is someone he's looked up to his entire life, someone he admires very much. He doesn't mean to fall apart, he does his best. If it had been someone like Merry or Gimli it would've been different, but Legolas is a role model for him, someone he depends on.  
  
That person who keeps reviewing your stories (It's too looooong to type out my whole email address.... wait, that was longer than my address (whoops) Hey, I need to enter a *valid* email address@ohwell.com): Yes, you did. Thanks, Ariel.  
  
Gwyn: He's not a dunce!! Have a little faith in "the young human", he'll do his best, even if it hurts Legolas in some way, I swear, it will help him.  
  
Kaimelieamin: Galadriel is just being. . .Cate Blanchett-like. I don't know. She is going to get Legolas in line no matter what it takes.  
  
Saki: Thank you. Now, why I enjoy Legolas's self-mutilation is that he's just about the closest thing to a role model I've got, and if he can go from being a cutter to being an Elf of incredible dignity and stability, well, then anyone can. It's not enticing that he hurts himself, it's enticing that he gets better.  
  
Thanks to all of you who took the time to review! I appreciate it!  
  
*****  
  
"Did you mean it?" Aragorn demanded. "Did you mean what you said?"  
  
He had waited as long as was needed. One by one the others had dropped off to sleep, conversation ceasing as fewer and fewer remained. He, too, had closed his eyes a few times, only to open them again, shaking his head, to see Legolas's gaze still intent on him and the fire still burning between them. The two had kept up this challenge for a long time, each silently daring the other to make his move. "Are you not going to rest?" Legolas had asked him.  
  
"I am not tired. You? No one needs stand guard here," Aragorn had responded.  
  
"Only making sure you are all right," Legolas had said with a slight laugh. Then he stood, stretching, and said, "Fare well, for the night, I go to find Haldir and his brothers."  
  
Legolas had disappeared into the night. Aragorn for a moment considered not following Legolas, but surrendering to the heavy sleep that tugged at him. Again he shook himself and stood, silently following the Elf. Legolas had detected footsteps behind him, and forgot that it could well be his friend. He whirled around, slamming Aragorn into the trunk of a thick tree. Aragorn was jolted by this, tears welling in his eyes from the shock and pain, but still he demanded, "Did you mean it? Did you mean what you said?"  
  
"My friend," Legolas said, biting each word. His voice was dangerous, and sounded as if he had to force every breath of it out of him, though his words were hardly anything but air. "I have said to you much as I could and why, how, can you demand more of me, how can you ask what you know I cannot give? How can you. . ."  
  
"Calm down--"  
  
"I will not calm down! You cannot tell me what to do! Do not tell me to calm down! I am calm!" Legolas was nearly hysterical now.  
  
"Legolas, please," Aragorn said, sharp but poised.  
  
"Do not. . .do not tell me. . ." Legolas continued, his hands making frantic gestures near his bent face. He could not stop moving, pacing, shaking, jumping up and down. Finally he stopped, turned, and pointed at Aragorn. He meant to be still, but he was shaking all the while. "You don't know. All right? You don't know me, you don't know what's going on, so just back off, all right?"  
  
Legolas turned and strode away. Aragorn gritted his teeth, then approached his friend. "Legolas," he began, putting a hand on Legolas's shoulder. Legolas had passed form a normal frame of mind. He had no idea who had touched his shoulder, but he grabbed the hand and wrenched it, flipping the person belonging to it to the ground. Aragorn rushed to his feet, and in a last-ditch attempt at renewing his friend's sanity tackled Legolas to the ground.  
  
No more were the two great warriors, no more were Aragorn son of Arathorn and Legolas son of Thranduil, no more were two beings of great bearing and respect. Now there were only two feral boys, tussling in the dirt, both lacking any sense of restrain. The difference in the two was that while one knew he had no check on himself and was well aware of what he was doing, finding a purpose in his actions, the other knew nothing but bloodlust.  
  
Throughout the woods of Lothlorien a whisper echoed, touching the minds of every being, alerting them to strange and disturbing happenings. Some, deep in sleep, only turned fitfully, and the whisper passed on. Others woke in confusion, strangers to the woods asked what could be happening.. Still others knew the trees well, and they awoke, lighting their lanterns and searching for the speaker.  
  
Legolas had drawn his knife. Aragorn saw the gleam in the moonlight. Glad though his was that this knife was not meant for his friend's flesh, fear gripped him, and he realized that indeed Legolas meant to kill him. In the Ranger's mind things snapped into place, common sense and battle instinct came together. Aragorn gripped Legolas's wrist, and the two grappled for the deadly weapon. They fell to their knees, the knife caught between them. Legolas thrust himself forward, and Aragorn flew back. But still he kept the knife in his grasp, and Legolas fell onto him. The two were pressed close, the knife's steel touching both of their bare skin. "I ask you to stop! Then I will ask no more," Aragorn shouted, or it felt like a shout, in the raging quiet it was naught but a whisper.  
  
Legolas did not relent, and Aragorn raised his defenses in return. The two rolled over and over, fighting for the knife; Legolas to kill, Aragorn in the interest of preservation. They lost their momentum at the foot of a small slope. From countless scuffles with his brothers Aragorn had learned primary tactics. He jammed one knee into each of Legolas's elbows, constraining the Elf, barring him the ability to get up. Legolas's fingers extended with much difficulty, then partially formed a fist again. The knife fell to the ground.  
  
"Damn you," Aragorn said tearfully, hardly whispering. "Damn you!" he reiterated, only this time he shouted it, hitting Legolas's pretty face. Animalistic rage took him, anger at Legolas. Aragorn's anger was irrational and ungrounded, save for the betrayal deep inside him, for how long had he admired and looked up to Legolas, a liar all this time?, but from the fight and the revelations of the day crazy hormones and endorphins affected his actions.  
  
Around the crazed Aragorn and the semi-paralyzed Legolas stood a small group of onlookers. Gimli, the Dwarf, watched with a mix of pity and empathy, though for whom it was impossible to say. Haldir, Rumil, and Orophin were there, watching with confusion. Two very unexpected Elves, for this location, shook their heads, understanding all too well what was happening. And at the head of this circle stood the Lady of the wood, Galadriel, Celeborn by her side, gazing down at the two children severely disappointed.  
  
"Come on, Estel. Let him up, come on," someone was saying, pulling Aragorn to his feet. The Ranger hardly noticed what name was being used, only knowing that it was his. He stood unsteadily, inspecting his bloodied hands for any serious injury, hoping none had been dealt out. "Legolas is all right."  
  
A similar voice spoke to Legolas, helping him sit, catch his breath. Legolas supported as much of his weight as he could, leaning the rest on the hand supporting his back. "All right, Legolas?" someone asked him. Legolas did not respond. He coughed, spilling forth some blood. Reaching up to his jaw he pulled forth a tooth, and looking at the small bit of his head a memory returned to him, and he cried, more blood flowing down his front. Squinting through tears he gazed at Aragorn, who seemed all right, just a bit shaken up. "It's all right. It happens," the voice said, rubbing his hand in small circles on Legolas's back.  
  
"Happens to who?" Legolas tried to control his tears, but they would not stop. After a few minutes they did, and he rubbed his eyes and stood, leaning against the anonymous somebody.  
  
"We all fall down," a kind voice said. Legolas knew that voice, and at once he knew who it was. Guilt washed over him. If for anyone, for him Legolas should not have fallen to cutting again. He was utterly let down with his actions.  
  
Aragorn was not as steady as Legolas. He held on to his brother's arms for support. "That's going to bruise," he whispered. Elladan laughed.  
  
"I've gotten plenty of bruises from you already. Don't beat yourself up about it," he said, allowing Aragorn to stand on his own.  
  
"What are you--" Aragorn began, but the Lady cut him off.  
  
"If you are quite finished," she said, speaking in such a firm and angry manner that no one dared interrupt her. "Legolas, Aragorn. Your actions here have shown only that you are little more than children. I am extremely disappointed with both of you. This situation will be dealt with first thing tomorrow morning. For now, disperse, and all of you get to bed." With this she left. Haldir placed a hand on Aragorn's shoulder and one on Legolas's, then stood as if he had something to say, let his hands fall, and walked away. Each of his brothers imitated.  
  
"Come on, both of you," Elladan said, half carrying Aragorn, who protested that he could walk just fine. To Elladan it hardly mattered. 87? Eh, what's eighty-seven years to an Elf? Aragorn was hardly a child as far as Elladan could see, and his little brother to boot.  
  
"You know," Gimli said, walking alongside Legolas, "I had a cousin once, name of Dwalin. . ." His voice faded into the distance, only Elrohir hearing what the Dwarf had to say. Legolas was still in a daze of reality, Aragorn and Elladan deep in conversation.  
  
When they reached the general area inhabited by the Fellowship, they found the Halflings taken again by sleep, and Boromir sitting by a smoldering fire. He gazed at the two new Elves, then turned to Aragorn. "I told you I did not trust these trees!" Boromir hissed. "Something has happened tonight, even they can sense it--" he motioned to the hobbits. "--we should leave."  
  
"The only disturbances here tonight were caused by Legolas and by myself," Aragorn said, weary.  
  
"Well then, Elf, what was going on?" Boromir asked Legolas.  
  
"He has to say nothing he does not wish to say," Aragorn interjected immediately on his friend's behalf. Then he fell to the ground, and in moments was asleep. Boromir looked almost worried, Elladan and Elrohir both were amused.  
  
"Hate it when he does that," Elrohir muttered. "All right, Legolas? Good night, then." But he and Elladan stayed, waiting until they were sure Legolas was asleep. Elladan wanted to put cream on Aragorn's hand and tickle his nose, for he was quite bored, but Elrohir jabbed his twin in the ribs and the idea was not mentioned again. "Go ahead, I'll catch up," Elrohir muttered. Elladan nodded.  
  
"Gimli," Elrohir ventured, "that story you told. . .was it true?"  
  
"As I live and breathe," Gimli replied. "Of course, I was very young, so I do not remember all of it, but I have been told the rest. I know what you're going to ask me now, to look out for Legolas, am I correct?"  
  
Elrohir nodded. "He came only to look after my brother, now someone must look after him."  
  
"I'll take the job. . .though I'd trust it better to Aragorn. Your Elf is safe with me."  
  
"Thank you," Elrohir said, "Good night, Gimli."  
  
Elladan had waited not far away, listening to Elrohir and Gimli's conversation. "What story?" he asked. "What story?"  
  
"Rest your tongue, and over-worked ears, for I shall tell you naught."  
  
Elladan began to protest. Elrohir grabbed the point of his brother's ear and twisted. His patience was getting a bit stretched. Hopefully, they would all feel better in the morning.  
**********  
That's all for now. Sorry it took so long, I was on vacation. But now I'm back, and plenty of Elf angst with me!  
  
Concerning Elladan and Elrohir: I didn't think it that unlikely that they could have been in Lothlorien. If there is any reason they absolutely cannot be in the story, tell me and I'll fix it. Actually, I'll probably just label the story AU, 'cause I'm in a lazy mood. But tell me anyway. 


	8. Nightly Leaves

Disclaimer: I do not own Lord of the Rings or any recognizable characters and/or places.  
  
Author's Note: I am so, so sorry that it took me so long to get a new chapter out. I still have a bit of writers' block, but I wrote this because I felt that I really owe you guys something, and that strange songfic really doesn't cut it. I hope you like this chapter, although it's a bit strange. Where there are rhymes, someone is singing. It should be easy to tell who is speaking. (the songs are in second person, between Legolas and Aragorn) Again, I am sincerely sorry. It's hard to write someone else's up when you are down.  
  
The Wanderer: Not dead yet! Again, sorry this took so long. I'll try to have out the next chapter quickly.  
  
Soulsearcher-Arbariel: Aragorn means well, you have to keep that in mind. He's frightened, and he doesn't know what to do, and he does not want to admit how child-like he feels. Yes, the Lady has that affect, doesn't she? Which outburst? When he and Aragorn fought or when he was talking to Aragorn a bit crazy-like? This is before Gimli and Legolas's friendship, but Gimli will play a larger role later on. As for the story. . .mwuhahahaha!  
  
Lady-Daine: How could they be going to the Havens? They showed up in Return of the King! As for the "humorous" way the twins treat their little brother. . .yeah, he's pretty much going to be a baby forever in their eyes, as far as my writing goes. As for the fight scene, fights are my trademark style: I always insinuate what's happening instead of saying it. And poor Haldir. . .he wasn't supposed to die!  
  
Goma-Ryu: So now you're prescribing crazy people soda? By the Valar, where did you get your degree? (just kidding, of course)  
  
Reginabean: Homework is so much better when you ignore it. (I've got to write a brief, but I think I'll be doing that after the Oscars)  
  
Queen of Shadows: As for Gimli's story, I am only at liberty to say this: you'll see.  
  
Tadrienda of Mirkwood: You'll see what happened! What's confusing you? Perhaps I can straighten things out.  
  
Earendilstar: How do you get those little dots over the "a"??? The twins are so awesome.  
  
Ola: You'll see what Gimli's story is. Aragorn gets lots of angst, as well, in this story.  
  
Saki: He is a role model to a lot of people. I know that I, personally, have no role models in life but I find that Aragorn and Legolas serve that purpose just fine--mostly the reason that I wrote this story, in fact. It helps me vent, and it's much healthier than. . .you know. The alternative.  
  
Alyssa-Anime-Angel: Thanks. I'm sorry this chapter took so long.  
  
Zelda123: Thanks! I'm sure you're a very good writer.  
  
ZeroCool: To Aragorn, Legolas had always been someone to look up to, someone who he could trust, someone who was strong enough to endure anything. Aragorn, in essence, idolized him. The fact that he hurts himself destroys what Aragorn saw in him. As for Gimli's story. . ."Good things come to those who wait."  
  
Liana Dimnauriel: Lucky!! It never snows here. Sorry this chapter took so long. Evil school. . .and various other things.  
  
Erhothwen: Estel! Legolas! No more fighting unless I say so! Anyway, Legolas, your self-esteem is so low you don't want revenge. Eep! Sorry for the delay.  
  
Pure Luck: It's good to know that someone likes the stories. Sorry this took so long to write!  
  
Queen-of-Gondor: Thanks!  
  
RainyDayz: Oh, no! That is not at all what the fight was about! Aragorn felt that Legolas had betrayed him on a very deep level, because everything Aragorn had seen in him--strength, endurance, cool-headed-ness, security-- it really wasn't there, or so it seems with the cutting. Aragorn and Legolas were both children as soon as that fight began. I know, I leave a bit too much unsaid. Sorry.  
  
Estelle Yavetil: Thanks, and I tried to.  
  
Lirenel: All in good time, all in good time. Thanks!  
  
Heather: I don't mind criticism, but could you tell me why it was confusing?  
  
Lindelothelieniel: The parts about Legolas's opinions of everyone really worried me. People might think I was taking too many liberties. I'm glad you liked it. Hypnotism. . .that is one thing I had not considered. Thank you for realizing that! They were supposed to be just like little children!  
  
Wicked Misty: Thanks. I'm afraid you will have to wait a while for the next morning. But no-one can stop the sun from rising!  
  
Kaimelieamin: But has Elrohir changed? Is he the same as he once was? A beta reader is someone who edits your work, reading it through before you post it. Do you know the Greek alphabet? "Alpha beta gamma delta. . ."  
  
Squirrel: Thanks. Sorry this one took so long.  
  
ElvenPrincessofLegolas: If Pippin had pulled out a glove, it would have been a bit too comedic. It would have taken away from the actual story. Thanks for reviewing, and I'm honoured to be on your favourites list!  
  
Tbiris: Wait and see!  
  
Gwyn: They were supposed to be acting like children. These sorts of things. . .they change people in strange ways.  
  
Fairylady: Cutting and such has a strange affect on people, especially people who do not partake in such activities.  
  
Ruby: O.k. Thanks for saying something.  
  
Author's Note: When Legolas was acting all jittery, he was supposed to be like Brad Pitt in Twelve Monkeys. Did everyone understand what the fight was about? Oh, and if my writing changes a bit, that's due to the book I'm reading (I Never Promised you a Rose Garden by Hannah Green).  
  
*****  
  
But rest came for not long to Aragorn and to Legolas, even in the peaceful realm of Lothlorien. Sure that his companions were asleep, Aragorn stood and made his way to a nearby tree. Carefully he pulled himself up onto the first branch, then the second. After a while the climb was almost routine, and Aragorn hardly noticed when he reached the highest branches. The sight before him cleared his mind of all thought.  
  
Aragorn, though he was no Elf, had keen sight for a Man. The heavens seemed open, littered with glittering points of light and warmth, smiling down on Middle-earth. A warm breeze blew, creating gentle music with the leaves on the branches. The moon was high and full, casting a pale silver glow over the world. Nightbirds sang out to each other, perfuming the air with their music.  
  
It felt so peaceful. For a moment Aragorn closed his eyes and let the breeze wash over him, afraid that when he opened his eyes the serenity would have fled; but it had not. "How can something be so beautiful, so perfect," he wondered quietly, "when so much is happening, that is evil, and when all that is beautiful must be in part destroyed?" Not only to Sauron did he refer, but to his friend. Why, Legolas? he wanted to ask, but could not.  
  
Meanwhile, down on the ground, Legolas rose in silence and stood beneath a large tree. He could not see the stars above him, but the freshness of the air was nevertheless a gift. Elven eyes gazed on his comrades, the sleeping Halflings who were so peaceful and knew so little of war and worldly affairs, Gimli the Dwarf, who he sometimes had to fight to hate, and Boromir, who meant well if he did annoy Legolas. Where was Aragorn? It mattered not. What right had he, Legolas, an Elf of such dishonour, to question the actions of another? What right had he to care for another when he hurt so the ones that cared for him?  
  
.  
  
"We were friends from the day I met you,  
  
Somehow we always made it through,  
  
Even though I kicked you and you choked me till my face was blue,  
  
So tell me now, what can I do?"  
  
.  
  
"I never meant to hurt you,  
  
I never meant to bring you down,  
  
But when should I have told you?  
  
What would you have had me express?"  
  
.  
  
"Let me come near you to take your pain away,  
  
I cannot endure it that you suffer day by day,  
  
When I am on the brink of madness, why are you in the fray?  
  
Why when I move to help you do you order me to stay?"  
  
.  
  
"I wish you could be near me without my having to fear,  
  
But how can you endear me when my downfall is so clear?  
  
More than else I wish to let you know,  
  
Why I had to make this pain show."  
  
.  
  
"On every cliff for you the edge is near,  
  
And when walking to your doom your path is clear,  
  
If you put aside whatever it is you fear,  
  
Would you see that to so many you are dear?"  
  
.  
  
"I want so much to tell you that I did not know it wrong,  
  
But I just went on dancing to the most dangerous song,  
  
Self-hatred never left me then, now hatred comes I knew,  
  
Tell me, my friend. . .how could I give this pain to you?"  
  
.  
  
"You tell me there is nothing wrong when I know that to be a lie,  
  
You act as if I could sit back and simply watch you die!  
  
Remember once a trick you taught me; pretend that you can fly,  
  
All it takes is the believe and that you try."  
  
.  
  
"Into the world you are so new it seems,  
  
Still clinging on to childish, boyhood dreams,  
  
I could not bear to let you see,  
  
The evil within me."  
  
.  
  
"And yet you treat me like a young boy,  
  
New in the world, so innocent and coy,  
  
You think I think that life is just a toy,  
  
Yet the advantage of blindness you employ."  
  
.  
  
"You may think you mean well,  
  
But you're under someone's spell,  
  
Broken people you cannot fix,  
  
And so with them, never mix."  
  
.  
  
"Stop holding me and pushing me back!  
  
I will not watch as you yourself attack!  
  
Not all the world around you is in black!  
  
Why for hiding until death have you a knack?  
  
.  
  
"Do you even see me for what I truly am?  
  
Reality must have hit with a slam,  
  
Because all I'll do is hurt you,  
  
And in those times I wish you'd hurt me, too."  
  
.  
  
Aragorn paused in his song as a few notes made their way up to him from below, carried by the wind. A soft voice sang them, a voice that, as Aragorn had done, wished to throw its sorrow to the stars yet at the same time feared to loose it, lest someone else catch it.  
  
"Through the window in my soul,  
  
In my heart you'll see a hole.  
  
Love gets out and hate comes in,  
  
You can try but will never win  
  
.  
  
You may think you care for me,  
  
But I am not whole you think I'll be,  
  
Though every single day I try,  
  
I know I will never fly."  
  
.  
  
"No, Legolas!" Aragorn cried before he could stop himself. The song paused, and Aragorn scrambled through the branches of the tree, gaining a few nasty scraps, to get to his friend before the Elf did something rash. "No, Legolas!" he repeated, standing breathless before the shocked Elf.  
  
Legolas opened his mouth, but no words came out. He swallowed, and tried again. "Aragorn," he said. Though the voice was meant to be even, it was not. The sounds wobbled and swayed up and down, mirroring Legolas's emotions.  
  
"Tell me what to do," Aragorn begged. "Tell me, I will do anything."  
  
Legolas could not reply. His heart was struck by his friend's loyalty, and by another emotion, one that made breathing harder and emptied his heart. With his eyes he conveyed to Aragorn his despair, and his sorrow, then he could stand it no longer, and tears streamed down his cheeks. Legolas burned with humiliation, not for crying, but for his inability to do anything for his friend.  
  
And all hope was gone. 


	9. Morning Comes Anew

Disclaimer: I do not own The Lord of the Rings or any recognizable characters and/or places.  
  
" "You burned yourself again?" Furii asked, drawing away the smile with which she had answered Deborah's.  
  
"I tried to, but I couldn't."  
  
"Oh?"  
  
"Because it HURT!" "  
  
" "You have no corner on suffering. . ." "  
  
-Hannah Green, I Never Promised You a Rose Garden  
  
"You should never let the sun set on tomorrow/Before the sun rises today"  
  
"But you're so far gone that you don't see the hands upheld to catch you"  
  
-Nine Days, If I Am  
  
The Wanderer: Does your name come from a book title? Anyway, well, I didn't know what to write so. . .yeah.  
  
Shauna: Thanks! It is sure reassuring to have such faith, isn't it? Don't worry. . .somehow or again, things will be well. Though perhaps not for many years. . .MWUHAHA!  
  
ElvenPrincessofLegolas: Considering what you and Ardana do to him, I could go for sainthood! Just kidding.  
  
Gwyn: Thanks. Yes, I did write the songs. No, you should not have to wait that long for an update. There should be a law against it.  
  
Pure Luck: I'll do my best to help him! Yeah, the twins would be awesome. . .perhaps they ill be in Return of the King? That was when they arrived in the books, after all.  
  
Queen-of-Gondor: Thanks, and I will try.  
  
ZeroCool: That does tend to happen, doesn't it? Sorry! **ducks in shame** But what makes you think that all Men are strong? You must realize what draws near for Aragorn, that his destiny taunts him. He has much to endure as well, and it is difficult for him. This news about Legolas was really too much. He does his best.  
  
Erhothwen: Yes, poor Elf, with his poor low-self-esteem . .aww. . .I guess I shall just have to update, huh?  
  
Lady-Daine: Aw, my weakness--I'm a total fan of Legolas, Gimli, and Aragorn, but the hobbits, well. . .they mean well, but. . .you know. I'll try to include them. Thanks for pointing that out or I would have forgotten! Thanks, and Legolas will have to get his hope back--as will Estel.  
  
Tbiris: Yes, that was quite a metaphor. . .there is hope, but it is so hard to see through the darkness. That's o.k., a sign of a good author is making a character come alive. Thanks, and hope you enjoy this chapter!  
  
Estelle Yavetil: Thanks.  
  
Tadrienda of Mirkwood: Thanks. Writer's block is. . .is Melkor's fault! Hehe, it's kind of natural to blame it on the Valar. Nah, writer's block is my fault. Anyway. You're welcome!! Thank you! That really made my day.  
  
Soulsearcher-Arbariel: Thanks! Don't worry, Elf-boy will get plenty of hugs. I'm sorry if I made you cry. LEGOLAS!! Quit being so sad! You're making my readers cry! Legolas: It's your fault. Me: Mutinous little. . .  
  
Dana Malfoy: Thanks for the encouragement!  
  
EarendilStar: Thanks for that code! Well, there will be plenty of at least one twin in this chapter, and their 'idiot blond depressive elf' friend has yet a journey before him. . .**continues to be mysterious**  
  
Alyssa-Anime-Angel: Thank you! I'm sorry I almost made you cry. . .  
  
Zelda123: Eep! Sorry! I didn't mean to make anybody cry, I swear! But thanks. . .  
  
Reginabean: There will be more as soon as I upload this chapter. . .hm, the Elf and the Man are getting it hard in this story, aren't they?  
  
Fellinlovewithsephy: Thanks! Yes, FINALLY. . .hmph. Hope this wait wasn't too long.  
  
Aryaveiel Skycryer: I am writing an original version, but Middle-earth is an already-developed place where I can. . .you know. . .get my footing. Galadriel was acting like someone's (Legolas's) mom because that was the role she was called upon to play. It was actually Elladan, not Galadriel, who pulled Aragorn off of Legolas after the fight. And what Galadriel said then was simply what she felt needed to be said. She wasn't saying 'Oh, look, I am older than you are', she was simply saying, 'act like a child and I shall treat you as such'. I think Legolas has already done a few stupid things, but he'll have to wise up sooner or later.  
  
Lady Lenna: Thanks! Who doesn't love Legolas?  
  
939597: Thanks. Don't worry, Legolas and Aragorn will have to work out their problems eventually. . .I hope. . .me: Guys, you did give your story a happy ending, right? Legolas: We-- me: No spoilers!  
  
Angel of the Elves: I tried to tell you, but your inbox was full. Sorry!  
  
Silver Spirit: As far as I know, Aragorn was eighty-seven, or there-abouts. He also says that he has not been to Lothlorien in forty-nine years, which would be quite difficult if he were forty two.  
  
Jessie-Greenleaf: Yes, I wrote that song. Thanks! I'll try to patch up their relationship. Anyway, it wasn't his wrist--it was his arms and legs. Wrist is a death-slit. Anyway, I'm glad you're enjoying this!  
  
Thanks to everyone who took the time to review! I appreciate it!  
  
*****  
  
"I just do not know what to do," Aragorn confided. "I feel that every action of mine is a stab to Legolas, I am over-cautious yet still I falter with each step I take."  
  
Elrohir and Aragorn ambled slowly through the forest. Aragorn poured out his troubles, glad to have them off his shoulders for a moment. It was true that he tried to help his friend, he did the best he could, but it seemed fruitless. In less than an hour he must meet with the Lady, and under her scrutiny he feared he would break. Elrohir, for his part, had found a very upset younger brother in need of a talk, and lent an ear.  
  
"If I may say so, Estel, this caution is your breaking," Elrohir counseled. "Legolas needs not a mother, he is fully grown. Let him be his own person, as you must be yours, but do not shut him out. He is still fragile, this closeness to the One Ring, I believe, is wasting him. What you need to do for Legolas is simply be yourself." Pausing in his step he turned to the Man, who looked suddenly much younger in his trouble and his need of guidance. "And that is nothing to be ashamed of," Elrohir added.  
  
"Thank you," Aragorn said, closing his eyes for a moment and nodding his head once slightly off to the side, his own small shrug-like gesture of appreciation.  
  
"No matter what, you are still my brother," Elrohir reminded him, inviting any further troubles to be spoken.  
  
Aragorn's shoulders fell and his gaze left Elrohir's eyes, shifting to the ground. "I. . .I am dissatisfied with myself, Elrohir. Try as I may, it is impossible for me to live up to all I should be, all everyone expects of me; you, Elladan, Ada, everyone. . .it is of love, and I wish more than anything to please you all, but this is something I cannot do. My character is greatly flawed. Mithrandir said to me, before he fell, that time drew near when I would reclaim the throne of Gondor. I worry for that time, Elrohir. For my inability, for the effects it would have on my people. . .I can not even please Ada, let alone an entire country."  
  
"Oh, Little One," Elrohir sighed, placing a hand on Aragorn's shoulder. "You need not worry what Ada thinks of you! He loves you, just as Elladan and I do. He believes in you. Did he not tell you only twenty years into your life of your heritage, when originally he planned to wait at least twice that? You are a man of valour, honour, and strength. You will do well."  
  
Elrohir did not lie, for he knew it pointless. If Aragorn, in Elrohir's eyes, were not a fit leader, Elrohir would say so. There was no need for anyone to suffer an incompetent leader. With a little self-respect and pride, Aragorn would see Gondor to days of glory. "Mithrandir chose you, Aragorn, and Mithrandir had a purpose in everything he did."  
  
"Elrohir. . ." Aragorn could not express his gratitude for what the Elf had said, what he had done. Elrohir smiled, for he already knew. The two embraced warmly, so much love between the brothers. For ever Aragorn would remain in the hold if he could, but he knew that he could not. "I love you so much," he whispered.  
  
"Tell me something I don't yet know," Elrohir replied. He also did not wish to do so, but he loosened his hold on his brother. "Have you not a meeting with Grandmother? Beware her wrath, Little One. Remember, be an ear and you shall always have one."  
  
"Thank you," Aragorn said once more, and propelled by a shove from his brother he headed off. A warm feeling remained, not only the warmness he and Elrohir had shared, but the confidence restored within him, a greater understanding of his ever-mysterious father, and the knowledge that despite the baby name or "Little One" Elrohir saw him as a man--for when he was not attentive, Elrohir had indeed said Aragorn.  
  
*****  
  
Gimli leaned his chin on his axe, nodding off. He had not gotten to sleep at all since the night before. When he found Legolas sobbing and Aragorn so uncertain, he had shooed away the Man at once. "Go! Get away!" he insisted.  
  
Legolas had looked at the Dwarf, and immediately tried to dry his tears. "Don't mind me, laddie. For tonight, just pretend you are not an Elf!" Gimli came off as a very gruff sort of person, he knew this well, but inside he could be quite soft. Even an Elf, he thought, did not deserve to suffer so.  
  
For the rest of the night Legolas had cried, somehow at ease around this Dwarf. There was no history between them, and Legolas felt that he did not need to be strong for him. Gimli did not see Legolas as "the Elf", but as a person, a manner in which Legolas had trouble seeing himself. The two had not exchanged words, but mere comforts of presence, and after a long while Legolas had fallen to dreams.  
  
Now as birds sang the morning in, Legolas stirred. "I was not asleep!" Gimli said at once, proud. Then, gentler, "Are you all right, lad?"  
  
Legolas nodded. "Thank you, for being so understanding last night I cannot imagine how you knew. . ."  
  
"You know, Elf, when you do something like this, you are not the only one it affects. Everyone around you is changed by your actions, and if it gets so far that you kill yourself, you leave more behind than you know. Aragorn, for one, would be much grieved at your destruction. He looks to you more than you see. His love is deeper than any cave a dwarf could build."  
  
No words seemed to merit a return to such a speech. Tears glimmered in Legolas's eyes, tears of gratitude but neither of mirth nor of sadness. "How do you know so much?" he could not help but ask.  
  
"Oh, so you think this only happens to Elves? Let me tell you, boy, you have no corner on suffering. My cousin had a problem similar to yours, and he decided to end it. Dwalin was a blind fool not to see how many people cared about him. Sometimes in the midst of a fall, we do not see the hands that could catch us, or we evade them." Gimli scoffed once, clearly unhappy. "I do not pretend to understand what is in your head, Elf, but it cannot be that bad."  
  
*****  
  
Aragorn and Legolas were far more confident than they had been the night before. They had far more faith in themselves, but that faith did not extend so far as to make them comfortable around each other. 'I have failed him,' each one thought to himself, 'I could have done so much better, been there for him, and look how I have failed. I am undeserving.'  
  
Legolas looked up from his shoes to see Aragorn staring at him. "Sorry," they said together, each returning his gaze to the ground. Both felt the heaviness between them, and both went to break it at once, together speaking each other's names.  
  
"Go ahead," Legolas offered. Aragorn was ready to offer it right back, then he remembered how hard this must be for Legolas, and he took a deep breath.  
  
"I just wanted you to know that. . .that I'm sorry. There is so much that I could do for you right now, so much I could be, and I have not been that, I have made things far worse. From now on, whenever you need to talk, I will listen."  
  
"No, Aragorn, it is I that should be sorry," Legolas amended. "I never showed you who I truly was, and this was wrong of me. You need me now and I am not what you expected."  
  
Neither could speak, each wondering how he could ever be forgiven and if indeed he could be forgiven at all. All at once it hit them that they were thinking quite the same thing as the other, and that if they did not stop this nonsense it would only continue onwards for all eternity. First Legolas then Aragorn began to chuckle. They dared to glance up, and as their eyes caught, they dissolved into fits of laughter.  
  
"We. . .Legolas, we are so stupid!" Aragorn gasped between breathless states of laughter.  
  
"Both of us are loony!" Legolas agreed, leaning against Aragorn lest he fall over. "Thinking. . .oh, my!"  
  
Something else occurred to Aragorn, and he howled, "The Lady is going to be so angry!"  
  
Just out of hearing of the two, Galadriel whispered to herself in an amused tone, "I am sure she is, Elessar. I am sure she is."  
  
Galadriel was ready to be as condescending and overbearing as necessary to get those two back in line. She found it completely silly that two grown beings should have such ill-earned lacks of faith in themselves, especially two grown males such as themselves. Galadriel would be a real martinet, if that was what it took.  
  
But that was not what it took. All it took was two adults giggling like boys, falling over each other, and realizing that maybe being grown up was not all that bad.  
  
*****  
  
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Author's note: I wrote 'Cold Steel', and this one as well, because I wanted to reach everyone who hurt himself or herself. There is no reason for that. I would know, I too am a cutter. Whenever I said 'my friend', I meant myself--I despise myself for it, but usually I simply realize that it is something I must move on from. The first, really bad time was when I was eleven. I am thirteen now, and despite a recent fall from grace, am growing and moving on.  
  
Recently in homeroom, I let a boy who I consider a friend read the poems written for the previous chapter. I hope he does not mind my saying that he told me he felt that easily he could imagine me reading one verse and him the next. I had not realized before then how much my "problem" affected others.  
  
Some people, like that boy, treat me the same as before, with an occasional mention of my fall from grace. Others, like Sam, are very careful, looking out for me, not knowing what to do but doing what is right, for their hearts are pure and (though I am an atheist) a star is guiding them. Still others know not what to do, but they try, and that is what matters. These people really, truly care about me. They do what they can simply by being there, and being the awesome people that they are. Not one of my friends has deserted me for what I did. I love them. They have given me the gift of my life.  
  
Not everyone has people like that. For those that do not, I am always here if you want to talk, e-mail me or AIM, but please do not hurt yourself. There is always a solution. It may seem dark, but if you hang in there, things will get better.  
  
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On another note, there will be one more chapter to this (an epilogue), and that will be all for this one. The NEXT STORY in this series will be called 'Nightly Gleams the Blade', or something along those lines. Hope to see you all back for that one!  
  
For now,  
  
JediKnightBalthasar 


	10. In Your Hands

Disclaimer: I do not own Lord of the Rings or any characters and/or places thereof.  
  
Zelda123: Thanks! And quite right you are.  
  
Alyssa-Anime-Angel: Thanks, and I think I understand about crying. Hope to hear from you soon!  
  
Erhothwen: Picturing Gimli in a cheerleading outfit. . .many laughs! Highly disturbing! And as for Legolas and Aragorn in cheerleading outfits. . .as Matt (a boy at school) says, "Delicious!"  
  
Eveyen: Thanks. It hardly seems to matter my age, anyway, but how old did you think I was?  
  
MorothewolfGod: Okay!  
  
The Wanderer: The book entitled "The Wanderer" by Sharon Creech. That's coincidental!  
  
ElvenPrincessofLegolas: Right. . .makes mental note. . .uh-oh, my mental post-it is losing it's stickiness! Burns Megan's reminder into brain. . .yeah, Ardana's a b*tch. You can't deny it, she is! Sl*tty Elven wh*re. . .sorry, that was going a bit far. It's actually quite fun to read, even if they do keep being f*cky at the end of chapters.  
  
Reginabean: Well, if you aren't responsible tell who ever is that giant ears are MONKEYS!! That was random. . .  
  
Tadriena of Mirkwood: Yes, the silly Eldar and Edan are finally snapping out of their weird lack-of-self-esteem phases! Thank you for your prayers-- faith in humanity is as good as faith in any deity, for me. Yes, I am thirteen, but in a few months I'll be fourteen. Thanks!  
  
Soulsearcher-arbariel: That is precisely the reason I used Legolas for these stories! He is so powerful, so. . .admirable. Does that make sense? That is an interesting idea. . .the sequel will probably be largely based on the films. Thank you. And friends really do matter. Mine are my life, also.  
  
Tini-Angel: Thank you. It is good to know that you are above your suffering. More strength to you for it.  
  
Earendilstar: Thanks! I am not dealing as well as I should like. Yesterday I sliced my leg in two places. But thank you for your words of strength and kindness. (Yeah, why does my age always surprise people like that?)  
  
939597: Everyone has problems, although some hide them so much it seems not so. You are certainly welcome, and thanks to you as well.  
  
SilverSpirit: Well, he is Numenorean. They age slower, in a way. . .he will live to be 210! Which speech? The only think I "borrowed" was Gimli's line, "you have no corner on suffering", as stated at the start of the chapter. No, not a psychiatrist--my great-aunt is, though! Yup, that is precisely why Legolas was eleven.  
  
Lady-Daine: Thank you for your strong, kind, and philosophical words. It means much to me that there are people out there who are not frightened by such an idea as masochism.  
  
S: You are welcome, and thanks to you as well. My friends, as far as I can see, are more of a gift than any ever granted. It is grievous that we must be so parted.  
  
Angel of the Elves: They feel they cannot stop, but they can. It is hard, harder than many other things, in fact harder than most other things, but it can be done. Stand by them. Support them. And thank you.  
  
JavaGalxy: It seems I have. Aw, no, The Lady does not approve of violence, being all Elf-ly as she is.  
  
Ola: Thanks!  
  
Estelle Yavetil: Thank you, and thank you for admitting that--it takes real guts (courage, if you prefer). Try hard for others and especially for yourself. Be strong.  
  
Tbiris: I love that poem!! A metaphor is a comparison using is. For example "Legolas is an anteater". He is not literally, but that metaphor means that he is like one. He's not, but it's the first thing that came to mind.  
  
ZeroCool: That's just it: being King worries him so much that Aragorn acts irrationally. He is unsure of himself and thus unable to deal well. But don't worry. He'll learn.  
  
Torture-the-Elf: Thanks. I'll read your fic when I can--I don't have a lot of online time.  
  
Jessica Greenleaf: Cut was. . .a good book, but I found it to be not incredibly accurate. Not all (or most) hospitals are like that, and not all cutters are, either. Thanks!  
  
*****  
  
"We apologize for our inability to accompany you," Elladan said.  
  
"We have a few errands to finish up first," Elrohir added, "but perhaps we shall not be parted for long after all?"  
  
"With hope," Aragorn said. The Lothlorien farewells were being said for Elladan and Elrohir, who had stolen a few moments to speak alone with their friend and brother. At Aragorn's comment the twins smiled.  
  
"Yes, Estel, you conceited monkey," Elladan teased. Aragorn laughed and attempted to imitate a monkey's face. Elladan nearly split his sides. "You look like a goose!"  
  
"Honk," Aragorn protested. "Very much honking!" Elladan and Aragorn stayed by themselves for a while, satisfied to make a few rather dirty jokes about geese and each other. Elrohir and Legolas drew away from them to speak of more serious matters.  
  
"I know you hate to talk about it, but he may ask questions," Elrohir told Legolas. "Now that he knows, it would be wrong not to answer his inquiries."  
  
"And this I will do," Legolas replied, "with borrowed strength and will."  
  
Elrohir gently placed a reassuring hand on Legolas's shoulder. "I have faith in you, mellon-nin."  
  
"And well placed," Legolas said. "Perhaps you underestimate your brother, though. He is no child."  
  
"Aye, yet you travel with four companions which, by my observation, are not unlike young Estel--mind you, by this I mean when he was a young boy," Elrohir pointed out. Both thought of the hobbits.  
  
"They do not know, Elrohir," Legolas reminded him.  
  
"And you plan not to tell them?"  
  
These words struck Legolas, and for a time he was quiet. Slowly he wandered away to a pond where he could sit and see himself. In the water he saw a younger Elf, his sleeves longer than his arms, his hair in dirty clumps, and his face worn with toils of inner struggle. Elrohir came, and stood behind his friend. In the water Elrohir saw himself younger, pulling his arm back and throwing something to the center of the lake. But that was a different lake, and both of those boys were many years gone.  
  
"Come, Legolas," Elrohir said, offering his friend a hand. "In my absence, look to Aragorn, for in my influence he has developed as strong an understanding as possible through empathy. You will trust him, won't you?"  
  
"Oh, Elrohir," Legolas sighed, embracing his friend, "you worry far too much for me. I am grown."  
  
"Aye," Elrohir placated, "'tis only love, comrade."  
  
"Aye."  
  
*****  
  
"Estel, solemnity for a moment, if you would grant it? Legolas is in your hands now. I trust that you will not disappoint me," Elrohir said.  
  
"I will do my best," Aragorn promised.  
  
"See to it that you do."  
  
Then as the Elven twins, the two sons of Elrond, left the forest of Lothlorien, Aragorn and Legolas stood by each other in mutual sorrow, and deeply regretted their leaving. "But come," said Legolas, the first to rouse himself from reverie, "we have yet each other."  
  
"And always will," Aragorn added. The two put each an arm around the other's shoulders, and as they had so often as young ones silently dared the world to stand in their way, one last time.  
  
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The sequel is up! Yay! If you liked this story, Nightly Gleams the Blade is now up. 


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